Apparently hated by right-wingers everywhere because he wasn't slavish enough in his devotion to Trump? The fellatio was OK but didn't give the balls enough attention?
Roy's got us so acclimated to crazy-expensive rich people clothes that when I click on one of his links and see an oxford shirt for ONLY $120, I think, "Hey, that's not bad..."
This is a weird thing to wish for, all other things being equal & universal, and let's face it – it's all just random associations of atoms an' suchlike...
Love it, very funny, and probably not THAT far off from the truth.
There were also some great bits parodying Barrasso's comment on Bluesky yesterday: "Mitch McConnell just helped me move a refrigerator into a 5th floor walkup apartment...."
i have it, in confidence, that beginning in 8th grade, all white male students are served Ancient Age rather than milk at the school cafeterias in Kaintuck.
Best horror-meets-political-intrigue since "The Manchurian Candidate." I cast Paul Dano as Gibson, Billy Bob Thornton as Doc Snortem, and John Goodman as the McConnell monster.
I was entertained the other day by learning that the word is from the old Persian for "milk and sugar," describing the alternating lines of smooth and puckered fabric.
The “touches of Extended Stay Hotel” is what distinguishes this from your run of the mill Mitch McConnell fanfic. Yes, the many takes on what McConnell and Barrasso did together are priceless, but they lack the attention to detail that Roy brings to his scenarios. Like many, I suspect the Senator’s EEG has been flat-lined for days, but that even a Republican corpse is focused on voter suppression and Platner speaks volumes to the obsessions of our corporate media.
The long-range plan seems to be rule by the cryogenically preserved head of Peter Thiel. It may finally cool down his fevered brow and popping veins, but the Little People will be lucky not to have immortality and be stuck in his scheme.
Futurama did quite a lot on the "Severed Head in a jar" theme. Including Nixon, of course, who runs for President as Robot Nixon - and wins, once the robot votes are counted.
Now you got me thinking about severed heads and the like in roleplaying games.
The cyberpunk horror game *Eclipse Phase* has the evil tyrannical AIs that take over Earth grabbing the fleeing refugee humans, snipping off their heads, and digitizing their brains for use in running menial labor systems. Imagine ending up as a drone crawling over the outside of a space station, doing safety inspections, for the rest of your conscious life. They can always fire up a copy of you if anything happens. Still, it's better than some; at least you have a body. You've spoken to a guy who works in the station infrastructure who does nothing but monitor the flow of water through the purifiers. There's millions of "people" in similar positions and the transhumanists who survived the AIs don't quite know what to do with them all; you can't murder them, for fuck's sake, but there aren't resources enough to give them organic bodies so some lower class folks end up in cheap Temu robot bodies. Which is better than living in crowded overworked servers with thousands of other refugees.
On the other hand, in the 90s-superheroes satire game *Underground*, organic human brains have been adapted as super-high capacity hard drives for computers. Since the acquisition of said brains can be and often is nonconsensual, it's to your benefit to act as stupid as possible so as not to be singled out for "donation". This is actually rather easy in a world where one of the most popular TV shows is something called "Big Dumb Animals Rip Each Other To Shreds", exactly what it sounds like. Imagine 2000s reality TV, but WAY STUPIDER.
In both cases, these things are very clearly in-universe characterized as Very Bad Things. And Underground is full of the most cynical satire I've ever seen in a game. It's a fun read, if nothing else. And the "fun" of a roleplaying game, well, that's a whole nother subject. It's complicated.
I was at a public hearing yesterday about a road the University of Wisconsin wants to put through a nature preserve, rather surprisingly a question came up, how the UW disposes of bodies donated for the medical students to learn on. The best we could get out of UW officials present was that no, there are no actual bodies buried in the preserve, but there might be cremains, near where they store the wood chips.
(PAGING DrBDH: at the time I wondered what an anatomy professor would tell those first-year students who worked on her cadaver, because a 103 year-old female without a uterus is surely not representative of the average human.)
This is kinda sorta why I'm considering presenting my corpse to the George Mason U body decomposition lab (which is really just a spot in the Manassas woods where they would dump me and walk away til they think I'm ripe enough for a forensic anthropologist). GMU's setup lets nature take its course so the bodies are in the sort of condition newly-discovered old bodies ought to be in.
Medical school established 1907? Post-19th century may or many not rule out a grave robber trade having disposed of stuff there.
Just speaking as someone who worked in the U of M med school (established 1850). Which had a brisk trade with "resurrectionists" until the state began regulating things.
L.O.L. For a minute there I thought zombie McConnell was going to be some sort of floating precog who could predict the crimes of Trump before he commits them. But then I realized you don't need a reanimated asshole to do that, just an imagination -- when it comes to Trump we're all precogs.
The myth about Cassandra implies this is some kind of rare gift she had, to predict the future and be ignored. Yeah, such a rare gift only half the population has it.
Yesterday, the Third Kid was griping about phone company monopolies and I was trying to describe THE PRESIDENT'S ANALYST to him. I can't not see Godfrey Cambridge here
Now, this is funny AF.
In the meantime, all appropriate thoughts and prayers to Moscow Mitch if isn't too late.
Thank you for the qualification —
Just have to make sure only the correct thoughts and prayers are utilized.
We wouldn’t the wrong ones.
No ululations for Mitch!
From us, you mean.
Afterlife Mitch will brook ululations from no one! NO ONE!
Apparently hated by right-wingers everywhere because he wasn't slavish enough in his devotion to Trump? The fellatio was OK but didn't give the balls enough attention?
Eh.
As always fuck their psycho feelings.
Ol' Buck (per that fashion link) seems to have lost a lot of weight, but couldn't afford a new belt, poor boy.
Also, again with the seersucker!. Oh well, guess it suits the occasion...
But the quivering hand...mmmWWWAAAAHHH!
Those loafers are actually a pretty good deal tho…
Roy's got us so acclimated to crazy-expensive rich people clothes that when I click on one of his links and see an oxford shirt for ONLY $120, I think, "Hey, that's not bad..."
Closest I'LL get to Oxford...
I could never wear that suit. Apparently you need to drink plenty of Scotch and write like Hemingway (or at least THINK you do) and I do neither.
Nice ! I can't wait till you start writing satire about all this.
Great stuff to read as I wait to have my prostate excised today. I hope there's a floating tank in the recovery room waiting for me.
Sorry, Bacta tanks are for Sith and Jedi only.
Ouch! Good luck!
Oh, man! Good luck to you!
YIPE! well, as the Chinese restaurant guy told Lenny Bruce, you're better off
This is a weird thing to wish for, all other things being equal & universal, and let's face it – it's all just random associations of atoms an' suchlike...
Best of luck.
Forgive me for posting this a day late and off the McConnell topic but consider it a continuation of yesterday's commentary. As usual Rebecca Solnit nails it: https://www.meditationsinanemergency.com/pod-save-patriarchy-or-whatever-that-sorry-platner-spectacle-was/
"same"
"Therefore, Democrats have to accept a little racism to win the working class" is the skeleton key to the past 50 years
Sixty. Nixon's "Southern Strategy" was borrowed from George Wallace.
"Hey, racism worked for us from the 1860's through to the 1960's, why not try it again?"
In which I get a little closer to understanding this "smooth-groin" thing. A little closer than I wanted to, actually.
Love it, very funny, and probably not THAT far off from the truth.
There were also some great bits parodying Barrasso's comment on Bluesky yesterday: "Mitch McConnell just helped me move a refrigerator into a 5th floor walkup apartment...."
Kaintuck be more like Brooklyn every year!
this one is a pleasure, but the herringbone didn't look like my 10th grade goin' to the sock hop calvin klein (and i meant that in a good way).
Fantasizing i'd like a great big pictorial representation of mistah mack conul, to throw a great big tumbler of bourbon at.
Save the Bourbons!
i have it, in confidence, that beginning in 8th grade, all white male students are served Ancient Age rather than milk at the school cafeterias in Kaintuck.
I'd posit that's true for all of the southern states, as it explains many things.
i was raised in NC, and it was Wilkes county moonshine.
Well, I hear bourbon is quite flammable, so I can imagine what happens to his picture once it's bourbon-soaked.
I was thinking more of the Frenchies of old...they weren't so afeared of the flame as the descending blade, but otherwise...
oh, the Bourbon bon bons, yeah, real sweet with a whiskey aftertaste.
Best horror-meets-political-intrigue since "The Manchurian Candidate." I cast Paul Dano as Gibson, Billy Bob Thornton as Doc Snortem, and John Goodman as the McConnell monster.
The accursed seersucker. It could have been just a fabric, but for the associated plantations, pols, and henchmen.
"A republic, if you can keep it" from the reaching hands of McCONNELL’s corpse.
"Accursed Seersucker" is the name of my next band
I was entertained the other day by learning that the word is from the old Persian for "milk and sugar," describing the alternating lines of smooth and puckered fabric.
Though the neo-Confederacy hasn't yet declared war on seersucker. And the elite will be allowed to learn algebra.
HILARIOUS! I just knew the False McConnell would talk like Foghorn Leghorn. The last line was particularly excellent.
The “touches of Extended Stay Hotel” is what distinguishes this from your run of the mill Mitch McConnell fanfic. Yes, the many takes on what McConnell and Barrasso did together are priceless, but they lack the attention to detail that Roy brings to his scenarios. Like many, I suspect the Senator’s EEG has been flat-lined for days, but that even a Republican corpse is focused on voter suppression and Platner speaks volumes to the obsessions of our corporate media.
Driving into the South on a family visit today, taking the backroads. Flesh starting to crawl.
One missed turn is all it takes to go from "Moonlight and Magnolias" South to "A Good Man Is Hard To Find" South. . .
On the other hand...a hard man is good to...ah, never mind...
Driving through the South I fantasized taking a can of spray paint to change " X Plantation" signs to "Slave Labor Camp."
Certain reactions to last year's burning of the Nottoway Plantation were, shall we say, instructive: https://www.instagram.com/p/DJsow90tvay/?img_index=5
Missed it the last time we burned the plantations, so I'm glad kids today have another chance.
A fun outing for all the family!
Hell, I'd go to see that. Make a big plantation house outta concrete, hose it down afterwards so you can burn it again next weekend.
McConnell in the tank reminds me of the Commander Powell scenes in 1974's "Dark Star".
It creeps me out to this day.
That and all those severed heads in boxes and brains in jars from shockfest features I loved as a kid.
Fortunately, I'm Little People. When I'm gone there will be no reason to keep any of me on this side of the abyss.
Unless...someone conducts a clandestine experiment.
Something to test the process for when it comes time to extend the rich and powerful.
Oh fuck!
The long-range plan seems to be rule by the cryogenically preserved head of Peter Thiel. It may finally cool down his fevered brow and popping veins, but the Little People will be lucky not to have immortality and be stuck in his scheme.
I couldn't find a cryogenic head cartoon (or remember what monster it had once been atop). But here's a nightmare that's not entirely SciFi. https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2025/12/29/2360260/cartoon/the-black-hole-2/
Futurama did quite a lot on the "Severed Head in a jar" theme. Including Nixon, of course, who runs for President as Robot Nixon - and wins, once the robot votes are counted.
Between Futurama, The Simpsons, Life in Hell, etc. Groening should be eligible for a Nobel Prize in Literature. He can stand next to Dylan any day.
I picture the Mitch McConnell thing as just his reanimated (wouldn't take much) head. See :56 seconds in: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSCMXVK3kec
I've never seen They Saved Hitler's Brain, but I believe it's also the head-on-a-pedestal thing.
And the musical comedy Walmartopia features the reanimated severed head of Sam Walton and a snappy musical number, "Listen to the Head!"
Señor Wences never accounted for how he happened to be carrying Pedro's head around in a box. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRBDRoMwWz0
Gravediggers of Democracy always be wanting to reanimate the führer heads.
"The Frozen Dead"
Oh I saw that one too.
Fuckin' chryo-preserved Nazis are the worst!
Note to mad scientists everywhere:
If your pet severed head is really pissed off, don't give it control of the arms hanging from the laboratory walls.
Goddamn Bluetooth. I knew we never shoulda let our devices talk to one another.
Now you got me thinking about severed heads and the like in roleplaying games.
The cyberpunk horror game *Eclipse Phase* has the evil tyrannical AIs that take over Earth grabbing the fleeing refugee humans, snipping off their heads, and digitizing their brains for use in running menial labor systems. Imagine ending up as a drone crawling over the outside of a space station, doing safety inspections, for the rest of your conscious life. They can always fire up a copy of you if anything happens. Still, it's better than some; at least you have a body. You've spoken to a guy who works in the station infrastructure who does nothing but monitor the flow of water through the purifiers. There's millions of "people" in similar positions and the transhumanists who survived the AIs don't quite know what to do with them all; you can't murder them, for fuck's sake, but there aren't resources enough to give them organic bodies so some lower class folks end up in cheap Temu robot bodies. Which is better than living in crowded overworked servers with thousands of other refugees.
On the other hand, in the 90s-superheroes satire game *Underground*, organic human brains have been adapted as super-high capacity hard drives for computers. Since the acquisition of said brains can be and often is nonconsensual, it's to your benefit to act as stupid as possible so as not to be singled out for "donation". This is actually rather easy in a world where one of the most popular TV shows is something called "Big Dumb Animals Rip Each Other To Shreds", exactly what it sounds like. Imagine 2000s reality TV, but WAY STUPIDER.
I realize "fun and games" does not always have a positive connotation. But these do seem to remove any possible "fun" part.
Have the designers tapped into the brainwaves of our tech overlords? If so, it'd be the first time anyone got something from them for free.
In both cases, these things are very clearly in-universe characterized as Very Bad Things. And Underground is full of the most cynical satire I've ever seen in a game. It's a fun read, if nothing else. And the "fun" of a roleplaying game, well, that's a whole nother subject. It's complicated.
I was at a public hearing yesterday about a road the University of Wisconsin wants to put through a nature preserve, rather surprisingly a question came up, how the UW disposes of bodies donated for the medical students to learn on. The best we could get out of UW officials present was that no, there are no actual bodies buried in the preserve, but there might be cremains, near where they store the wood chips.
My mother wanted to be donated to a medical school, and they returned the cremains to us a year later. Somebody's cremains, anyway —
(PAGING DrBDH: at the time I wondered what an anatomy professor would tell those first-year students who worked on her cadaver, because a 103 year-old female without a uterus is surely not representative of the average human.)
Rejected as a cadaver! Well, at least she was not sensible to the indignity.
This is kinda sorta why I'm considering presenting my corpse to the George Mason U body decomposition lab (which is really just a spot in the Manassas woods where they would dump me and walk away til they think I'm ripe enough for a forensic anthropologist). GMU's setup lets nature take its course so the bodies are in the sort of condition newly-discovered old bodies ought to be in.
Beats the expense of commercial green burial.
Maybe they could stage some kind of bicycle accident involving a bear. Those forensic anthropologists probably haven't seen that one yet.
Circus bear on bicycle runs down innocent pedestrian!
Medical school established 1907? Post-19th century may or many not rule out a grave robber trade having disposed of stuff there.
Just speaking as someone who worked in the U of M med school (established 1850). Which had a brisk trade with "resurrectionists" until the state began regulating things.
"severed heads in boxes and brains in jars from shockfest features "
eg, Basket Case...
L.O.L. For a minute there I thought zombie McConnell was going to be some sort of floating precog who could predict the crimes of Trump before he commits them. But then I realized you don't need a reanimated asshole to do that, just an imagination -- when it comes to Trump we're all precogs.
The myth about Cassandra implies this is some kind of rare gift she had, to predict the future and be ignored. Yeah, such a rare gift only half the population has it.
Diner beat reporters refusing to interview Cassandra, or that half of the population.
Yesterday, the Third Kid was griping about phone company monopolies and I was trying to describe THE PRESIDENT'S ANALYST to him. I can't not see Godfrey Cambridge here
"a large glass cylindrical tank full of green fluid'
Goddamn algae gets EVERYWHERE
I see a business opportunity here. A pool care company specializing in cryogenic embalming tanks.
That's what happens when you cheap out on your cryogenic products and order them from Temu.