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"Room Full Of Barron Trumps" as the Tenth Circle Of Hell. ("Room Full Of Charlie Kirks" as the Eleventh Circle.)

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Where does Jacob Wohl fit in?

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Anyplace credulous morons gather?

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I don't remember The Inferno as well as I should, but any properly run hell would have a Malevolent Farce section.

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Here you go:

Circle I: Limbo

Resided by virtuous non-Christians and unbaptized pagans

Circle II: Lust

The souls here are punished by being blown about violently by strong winds, preventing them to find peace and rest.

Circle III: Gluttony

Sinners lie rotting away in a never ending icy rain, overlooked by a worm-monster Cerberus.

Circle IV: Greed

The inhabitants drag about heavy weights and boulders with their chest all the time.

Circle V: Anger

The wrathful fight each other on the surface of the river Styx.

Circle VI: Heresy

The heretics were souls who did not agree to the Christian doctrine. They are lying in burning tombs.

Circle VII: Violence

The 7th circle is divided into 3 rings — outer are murderers sinking into boiling blood, the middle are the suicides who turned into bleeding trees, and the inner ring are blasphemers and sodomites who reside in a desert of burning sand and are scorched by burning rain falling from above

Circle VIII: Fraud

This circle of Hell is divided into 10 Bolgias or stony ditches with bridges between them. Each bolgia has a different kind of fraud and punishment such as whipped by demons, steeped in excrement etc.

Circle IX: Treachery

The betrayers are stuck frozen in a lake of ice. The lake consists of 4 rings, with the last level resided by Lucifer, Brutus, Cassius and Judas.

So Trump himself belongs in almost every Circle. I would say Kirk and the kids belong in Circle VIII.

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And who says Christianity isn't a religion of love?

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To be fair, this is no Church's doctrine, this was Dante with loads of scores to settle—though most of these sound better than the New Testament's lake of fire, speaking as someone who recently deglazed with Everclear and nearly lost his hair, {Lex Luthor}-style.

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Breath taking. Great work!

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I'm pretty they don't return his calls, which is his crew go rogue all the time

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"Where the carcass is, there the vultures shall gather together." Matt. 24:28

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"LANCE: I talk to text, I can’t read."

"LITTLE KID: WarPigBird12, ArmyWifeScrapbk, PrincessMAGA756, MAGAgolfballs54, PedoBiden838494,PedoBiden838495, PedoBiden838496, PedoBiden838497, PedoBiden838497, PedoBiden838498..."

Both made me laugh. Dunno why but maybe a sign of how defective I am?

As for Barron... Amusing but I have the same problem with the use of Barron as I do with Roy's Trump. With the latter, Trump's written as having an IQ at least 5-10 points higher than reality. He sounds too smart. (I acknowledge that I probably underestimate Donnie's intelligence. That said, if he's a magnitude smarter than I believe, he's still a fucking moron.)

As for Barron, he has "learning disabilities" per someone I know who I trust on the subject. My rule is to have no more respect for him and his condition and his parents do. When they respect his situation, show a little love, I'll be happy to provide full respect for him and his privacy. Of course, both parents can't do that -- maybe Melania can if Donnie paid her enough but that's not happening. So till then, my compassion gets directed elsewhere. You know, to the more deserving. I mean, Barron clearly has issues, but he's going to be pretty wealthy someday. I'm saving my limited compassion for those outside 1%er bubbles.

So, I guess, Roy's Barron is far removed from reality-Barron but I have no real issues with that.

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I'm hoping the wealth is siphoned off by assorted guilty verdicts. Does the Capone kids keep any money? I'd like to see each Trump kid get reduced to living off a trust that pays them $85k each annually. That's for sure enough to live on and even have some real fun! But boy o boy will they bitch about it and mistake it for squalor and feel angry about forever, instead of simply glowing because $85k/year for life for no reason is a damned lotto victory.

I don't feel sympathy for Barron either (and maybe that's a moral failing; I have a few!) but I do feel curiosity. He is essentially a Dickens or even Gothic character. The ingredients for a weird tale are all in place. Enormously wealthy father he barely knows. Raised in a different wing of the house by a semi-protective hooker. Not known ever to speak. Let's see how it plays out!

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That's $232.876 per day, so ~1/4 of Publisher's Clearing House money

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Donnie has a sick attraction for Ivanka. Other than the older three are tools and props. Tiffany is of no great importance. Barron is less than that. Per my source, a special ed student (or, I suppose, an elite equivalent).

While Barron is of no importance to the older three, he'll be fine financially so, you know, not gonna waste any compassion on him.

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Is it wrong that I'm okay with Barron once he slugged Kirk?

Very nice, Roy, I needed that. Someone yesterday noted that the wingnut sugar daddies paying kids to accuse the left of being paid to protest is kind of perfect Trumpian politics.

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"Is it wrong that I'm okay with Barron once he slugged Kirk?"

Since Roy-Barron is a nearly complete fiction, it's fine to be okay with him slugging Kirk.

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nearly complete fiction -- how do you know?

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I like this development for Barron: the punditry had this weird fantasy going that he was a hostage, when really he is in development to conform to his father's patterns. He's a snapshot of DJT at whatever age he's supposed to be.

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I knew we were going to get a chapter on this from you as soon as I read the story in the Post. Kirk is a despicable character and has one of the most punchable faces in Trumpworld, and that's saying something. Perhaps only Jared and Trump himself are more powerful fist magnets.

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Welp, you've done it now. The only unpardonable sin in American politics: mentioning Barron Trump. They'll be coming for you now. I've enjoyed your work. RIP Roy.

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Fuck Barron and the #MAGAts' feelings (if that's the word) for him.

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Every parent of more than one teenage boy knows there is a critical mass of the same which will create pubescent fusion. Your depiction is quite spot

on but needs more farts and derogatory comments about thots.

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Since his late Turning Point co-founder* plucked him right out of high school, I'd love to see mentions of this über-grifter always written as "high-school graduate Charlie Kirk," especially as he gads about chapters on college campuses. He's one of the worst, but since he's harvested millions from right-wing moneytits, I expect he'll be gunning for Marco Rubio's job soon.

It was a joy to see him cold-cocked (and possibly stomped on?) by America's Future.

*sadly, a victim of Covid

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"When I’m president I’ll fuck you all up!"

I give Barron 50/50 chances of being President someday - after he assassinates his Uncle Don Jr. in a bloody coup.

Yep, I can see it. Hehe, thanks for the morning funnies Roy.

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He might just accidentally crush him. The kid's kinda huge.

I will note that it took all of a day for them to get "George Soros funded protestors are coming to get you" trending on twitter.

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My son and his friends have been to protests in Portland. My son could use some of that sweet Soros cash... so WTF Soros, I know you're ubiquitous and are reading this post. Cough it up ya bastard!!!

LOL

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Yeah, really. Where are our $oro$timulu$ checks???

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Saw the original article in WaPo. This send up is pretty good. In the giant ocean of social media exchanges, I really have to wonder how much of an impact this kind of transparently stupid propaganda operation is likely to have. I don't read this crap so I'll take your word for it that it is this kind of incoherent garbage.

The biggest challenge is even getting young people to vote. Most of them face huge structural obstacles - designed explicitly to make it as hard as possible to vote - rather than ideological messaging. Also, aside from a relatively small number of dedicated MAGAts, most young people who are actually engaged find Trump and his minions horrifying.

But, interesting your take on Barron, about which we know next to nothing, I think, in stark contrast to Sasha and Melia, Chelsea Clinton or even W's party girl daughters. (I don't include the older Grotesque Trio of Trump kids.) Your take seems to be that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and that Barron is as much of a monster as his Dad. Interesting.

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I'm not sure the other royal children are much better. But they were probably not bred to brutality.

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"BARRON reaches into his jacket pockets and throws wads of cash at the center of the table."

Well, at least the old man taught him how to settle a lawsuit against him. Needs an NDA.

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Say what you will, I'm glad to see this evidence of Trump folks keeping their promise to bring outsourced jobs back to America--from Romania in this case https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/ny-facebook-troll-farm-romania-fake-accounts-removed-black-trump-20200807-4syg4wga7fdvznldruc3cfxgdq-story.html

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It's thrilling to see Barron depicted as a vile Harkonnen scion, all the more so because the few glimpses we get of him show a tall, troubled lad who just might deserve one's sympathy. His father is Donald Trump and his mother is Melania Trump. His step-siblings are Don, Jr. Eric, and Ivanka. The poor bastard never stood a chance.

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Pretty tacky doing what Donnie surely does and forget Tiffany.

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Honestly, you had me at "Juicy Juice Teasers".

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