I reread Conrad's The Secret Agent as a sort of palate cleaner after Chesterton's The Man Who Was Thursday: dark realism, and the squalid nature of the plotters and those they involve in their plots.
The status fetish for handbags and purses that cost thousands — even, in the priciest configurations, tens of thousands of dollars — makes me crazy. I want to see a rich woman carrying a plain brown paper shopping bag with the following scrawled on it by a Sharpie:
This represents the pink Fendi Baguette bag I was thinking of buying, but I gave the $4000 to a food pantry instead.
At some point you can't spend it fast enough, even if you tried, even if you stayed up 24 hours on ketamine just buyin' stuff. I mean, sure, you could give it all away pretty quick, but c'mon.
A friend of mine was in NYC a few years ago, and came across some guy selling cheap watches on the street. He bought a Yuri Gagarin one, with many various dials. At some point he realized that only the main time keeping dial worked, and the rest were merely printed on a sticker. Still, it was worth it, as he'd only paid $15 for it.
Hear hear. And the crazy part is the best quality bag tops out at $200-300 in terms of workmanship and materials. After that you're paying for the label. Insanity.
I like a story with a good McGuffin. Instead of going, “I must be out of it,” I can say, “Aha, a McGuffin!”
Anyway, I also like that the Catholic mansplainer in the link is named Pope.
Now can we get back the attempted erasure of due process previously underway in the DOJ? Is Bondi going to be cited for criminal contempt of court? Will Federal Marshalls be ordered to arrest her? Be sure to tune in when we hear Kash Patel say, “I need a new list of enemies, one with more blonde Cabinet members.”
Don't you just wish that soon the vatican will need a second rest room, in addition to the current one? You know, the one with the sign on the door that says 'Pope John'?
Ha fucking ha, when the goddamn J6 chuds FILMED THEMSELVES CRIMING and all the dopes scream about how quickly those Noble Patriots 🤮 went to prison. MAYBE DON'T LIVESTREAM YOUR INSURRECTION
And fuck Obergruppenführer Miller sideways with a chainsaw anyway, at least the insurrectionists got lawyers and trials and the State provided evidence. It'd only be equivalent if Biden had been having DOJ grab anyone on the street listening to Joe Rogan. (Hm... 🤔)
Or maybe Trevanian. ( Don Winslow wrote a prequel to one of the Trevanian novels. Best beach book ever! ( It was a good book, I read it on the beach.) )
I have a hard time believing these people actually plan, though.
That Vance (not his real name) killed the pope is one hill that I'm willing to die on.
That Noem had some involvement which in turn is not unrelated to her lost purse or whatever, such I'm a'sussing here, is something that did not cross this dotard's mind.
Can't wait to see who Donny has chosen as the new pope.
The schmuck putting his sins on an index card was LOL. Brought back memories of making up sins as a kid to tell in confession because the real ones were too embarrassing.
When I read that, besides money, her passport, and the directions on how to kill the pope, Noem's purse contained her makeup bag my first thought was just how big was the damned thing?
I'm refusing to believe it could all fit on an index card, unless it's like those pages from House of Leaves where the text is so thick it's just one mass of black.
As soon as I heard about Francis' exit, I thought of "Three," as they call it on "The Sopranos," and wondered who'd take the best shot at it. As always, you deliver.
I didn't know the significance of the $3000 until after I read this.It's that attention to detail that makes REBID your top value propsition in today's competitive satire market. After all, keeping up with reality is hard work.
This is wonderful, I saw the number, and not knowing anything naturally wondered if there was something special about it, so I just googled is it a perfect square, is it a perfect cube, and the "AI overview" gave me this:
Yes, 8647 is a perfect cube. Specifically, it is the cube of 21, as 21 * 21 * 21 = 8647.
Which, as you point out, is wrong. Now I'm sending this to every math teacher I know.
Putting Noem up to this makes sense, and meets the competence level.
There's so much multi-tasking by this mob. All those multiple job titles per flunky, appointments by diktat, and such. Doing in the Pope must have been a quick breather for Witchfinder General Vance. He has so many other assignments, like ridding the Smithsonian of improper ideology. Wasn't it just before his big weekend that he was appointed to be fall g... --er-- "Tariff Czar"?
0.) Reading the start of this, I was sure that Vance would screw-up.
1.) Wife suggested that Vance had killed Francis '…with an especially comfy couch' leaving me to add '…that he had fucked into an Instrument of Death!', thinking of James Bond 'turning' a Bad Guy's minion through rapy sex.
2.) This atheist Jew's gloss on the excellent article on "Ordo amoris":
a.) R. Hillel (paraph.): 'If I am only for myself, what kind of jerk am I for?'
b.) People who say 'Charity begins at home.' intend never to practise it anywhere else, and likely not much at home.
b.i.) Waiting until things are just right here—your home, your neighbourhood, your country—before having any particular concern beyond 'here' is a dandy way to avoid ever having to do that.
b.ii.) R. Tarfon: 'It is not your task to complete the work, but neither are you free to desist from it."
3.) Suddenly remembering that what Marx called 'The blinkered self-centredness («Idiotismus») of rural life seems to be held-up as _ideal_ by some people.
Still, the hypocrisy Vance gives to caritas is still preferable to outright hatred of it, whether that's out of a Randroid-adjacent ideology (Thiel, Musk) or from monstrous selfishness (Trump and his media personalities, including Noem and M.T. Greene). Say what you will about Catholicism—please!—it has had its moments of humanism and intelligence, such as the padres' refusal to accede to the conquistadors' demands that they rule the American natives to be soulless, and so _legitmately_ treatable as animals.
"2.) This atheist Jew's gloss on the excellent article on 'Ordo amoris' ":
This lapsed Protestant agrees. And when he got to the part about the fire department and the responsibility of paying taxes to support it--it was "Render unto Caesar" all over again. Which knocks flat tax cuts for billionaires.
PS: I couldn't let "Ordure Amoris" go by unchallenged. JD and Steven Miller want a Ministry of Love.
As someone who almost died of heart failure and had my dad, brother and sister die from this, let me say there is no need to bring Jedediah Dangit Vance into this.
For some reason, "The Gang that couldn't Shoot Straight" comes to mind.
"The Secret Agent" as farce maybe.
Now all I can see is JDV holding his shoe-phone up to his ear as he lurks in the Vatican, lol.
Oh yeah. And he'd be the first to demand the Cone of Silence as he logs onto the unsecure network.
I thought that was The Prisoner.
Can we yet answer the question 'who is Number 1'?
Much like the original series, we just don't want to believe the answer.
I definitely know who "number two" is in this case!
He was a Danger Man
All I can remember from that book is the lion.
I've been thinking about that book lately, and I'll take this as the reminder to dig it out and re-read it.
I reread Conrad's The Secret Agent as a sort of palate cleaner after Chesterton's The Man Who Was Thursday: dark realism, and the squalid nature of the plotters and those they involve in their plots.
https://bsky.app/profile/link.spacelawshitpost.me/post/3lnearwegu22n
That one might be the best ever.
https://bsky.app/profile/bigdamnherossir.bsky.social/post/3lnea5k5nmk2l
The status fetish for handbags and purses that cost thousands — even, in the priciest configurations, tens of thousands of dollars — makes me crazy. I want to see a rich woman carrying a plain brown paper shopping bag with the following scrawled on it by a Sharpie:
This represents the pink Fendi Baguette bag I was thinking of buying, but I gave the $4000 to a food pantry instead.
(And it's even worse in men with watches.)
At some point you can't spend it fast enough, even if you tried, even if you stayed up 24 hours on ketamine just buyin' stuff. I mean, sure, you could give it all away pretty quick, but c'mon.
Hearted, but pretty easy target...
Expensive watch fetishism is insane. You *need* bags. Unless you're imminently deep-sea diving, nobody really needs a chronometer.
Hearted, but I got a cheap one on my wrist right now, 'cause I can't be bothered to look at my phone.
Wait, you wear a clock on your wrist?
How odd!
You shoulda seen somma the other body parts I tried it on!
A friend of mine was in NYC a few years ago, and came across some guy selling cheap watches on the street. He bought a Yuri Gagarin one, with many various dials. At some point he realized that only the main time keeping dial worked, and the rest were merely printed on a sticker. Still, it was worth it, as he'd only paid $15 for it.
Yes, but what if the Secretary of State invites you to go deep sea diving, huh? Whatcha gonna do THEN?
Hey, what if I'm a hot babe that Jeff Bezos invites to do a little spacefaring, and then I need one o' them ASTRONAUT watches!
Hear hear. And the crazy part is the best quality bag tops out at $200-300 in terms of workmanship and materials. After that you're paying for the label. Insanity.
I like a story with a good McGuffin. Instead of going, “I must be out of it,” I can say, “Aha, a McGuffin!”
Anyway, I also like that the Catholic mansplainer in the link is named Pope.
Now can we get back the attempted erasure of due process previously underway in the DOJ? Is Bondi going to be cited for criminal contempt of court? Will Federal Marshalls be ordered to arrest her? Be sure to tune in when we hear Kash Patel say, “I need a new list of enemies, one with more blonde Cabinet members.”
"Not THE Pope, ALEXANDER Pope!"
For modes of faith let graceless zealots fight;
His can’t be wrong whose life is in the right.
"Smoke 'im if you got 'im"
Burma Shave
Alexander Pope, Burma Shave ad exec.
Blessed is the man who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed
He's pithy, that Pope.
That boy could write a couplet.
He wrote his couplet in a doublet
Hope he didn't get in troublet
When I think of the conclave I'm hearing 'concave' and thinking "oh, yeah – JayDee's face, in a perfect world".
Vexing conman with the caved-in face.
Not Alexander Pope, ART Pope!
Don't you just wish that soon the vatican will need a second rest room, in addition to the current one? You know, the one with the sign on the door that says 'Pope John'?
I was guessing John Pope, the mediocre Union General
John Pope's Dress Coat is scheduled to play Lollapalooza this year
Hearted whether, strictly speaking, true or not.
Truth, strictly speaking, is overrated.
They are opening for The Smoking Popes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJ3FQXgBXZI
Stephen Miller says the El Salvador deportees got more due process than the 1-6 people
Ha fucking ha, when the goddamn J6 chuds FILMED THEMSELVES CRIMING and all the dopes scream about how quickly those Noble Patriots 🤮 went to prison. MAYBE DON'T LIVESTREAM YOUR INSURRECTION
And fuck Obergruppenführer Miller sideways with a chainsaw anyway, at least the insurrectionists got lawyers and trials and the State provided evidence. It'd only be equivalent if Biden had been having DOJ grab anyone on the street listening to Joe Rogan. (Hm... 🤔)
This is just one of those things they say in a vain attempt to make my head explode.
Like JD Vance blaming the Iraq war on Europe.
Any cite of that name and his utterances should begin, "Spittle-flecked Stephen Miller says..."
Are Duke boys ever spittle flecked. Well except when yelling at The Help!
Seems like a potential dilemma over which to choose. Is it to be rage over The Help, or joy at berating them?
A whole heap of Ludlumy goodness!
Or maybe Trevanian. ( Don Winslow wrote a prequel to one of the Trevanian novels. Best beach book ever! ( It was a good book, I read it on the beach.) )
I have a hard time believing these people actually plan, though.
A real pro would have worked in John F Kennedy's Disappearing Ivy:
https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2025/03/the-countrys-most-famous-houseplant-is-missing-what-did-trump-do-with-it
"With its own Instagram account and generations of progeny that even Elon Musk can’t rival, the humble houseplant enjoys a cult following."
So then, doomed as a marker of "continuity and stability and all the things we value about how we change power in the country."
Pulmonary Embolism Pill (PEP) from 'The Parallax Conspiracy'.
But this is too classy for JDV, his go-to is huffing amyl nitrate into the Pontiff's face as he leans over to kiss the ring.
Next stop: Netflix. And fuck "Limited Series," this could run for four seasons.
At Four Seasons Landscaping you mean? 'Cause it's time to rope them back in...
That Vance (not his real name) killed the pope is one hill that I'm willing to die on.
That Noem had some involvement which in turn is not unrelated to her lost purse or whatever, such I'm a'sussing here, is something that did not cross this dotard's mind.
Can't wait to see who Donny has chosen as the new pope.
Here's to the new Papa, decidedly not same as the old Papa.
Not to be confused with Popa Chubby.
It's going to be interesting if we find out where those ID documents ended up.
Noem would have shot the Pope and his little dog, too
The schmuck putting his sins on an index card was LOL. Brought back memories of making up sins as a kid to tell in confession because the real ones were too embarrassing.
When I read that, besides money, her passport, and the directions on how to kill the pope, Noem's purse contained her makeup bag my first thought was just how big was the damned thing?
"I... uh... yeah... definitely took the Lord's name in vain... uh... three times."
"Brought back memories of making up sins as a kid to tell in confession because the real ones were too embarrassing"
is as good an illustration of the ludicroustiness of organized religion up with which I could ever come.
I'm refusing to believe it could all fit on an index card, unless it's like those pages from House of Leaves where the text is so thick it's just one mass of black.
As soon as I heard about Francis' exit, I thought of "Three," as they call it on "The Sopranos," and wondered who'd take the best shot at it. As always, you deliver.
Humbled
I would have gone with Adrian Vermeule
Filed under:
Politics
Religions and other myths
Dominionist authoritarian bullshitters
I didn't know the significance of the $3000 until after I read this.It's that attention to detail that makes REBID your top value propsition in today's competitive satire market. After all, keeping up with reality is hard work.
Am I the only one here who had to have 8647 explained to him?
I didn't even get that far, your comment was the first I heard it was even a question. You talking about how it's a perfect cube? (21x21x21)
Stop messing with my head, man. 21 cubed is 9261. No, what it means is:
86 = get rid of
47 = you-know-who
Some guy on FB is soliciting memes illustrating this universally-longed-for event.
This is wonderful, I saw the number, and not knowing anything naturally wondered if there was something special about it, so I just googled is it a perfect square, is it a perfect cube, and the "AI overview" gave me this:
Yes, 8647 is a perfect cube. Specifically, it is the cube of 21, as 21 * 21 * 21 = 8647.
Which, as you point out, is wrong. Now I'm sending this to every math teacher I know.
Happy to help.
[insert snappy "AI, AI, Captain!"]
Did I post this here yet? To the tune of "Cielito Lindo"
Artificial Intelli-
Gence is well known so no
One can say why
Linda McMahon has never heard
That its acronym goes by AI
AI, AI, AI, AI
Steak sauce you pour on
Your tri-tip, your T-bone, or New York strip
But AI’s not A-1, you moron
Putting Noem up to this makes sense, and meets the competence level.
There's so much multi-tasking by this mob. All those multiple job titles per flunky, appointments by diktat, and such. Doing in the Pope must have been a quick breather for Witchfinder General Vance. He has so many other assignments, like ridding the Smithsonian of improper ideology. Wasn't it just before his big weekend that he was appointed to be fall g... --er-- "Tariff Czar"?
Chief Tariffraff
Sharif al-Tariff
His next assignment: Rocking the Casbah.
As opposed to Rockin' the Cashbox. Which is what they're all doing.
Laffy Tariffy
HOW COULD YOU FORGET GREENLAND
0.) Reading the start of this, I was sure that Vance would screw-up.
1.) Wife suggested that Vance had killed Francis '…with an especially comfy couch' leaving me to add '…that he had fucked into an Instrument of Death!', thinking of James Bond 'turning' a Bad Guy's minion through rapy sex.
2.) This atheist Jew's gloss on the excellent article on "Ordo amoris":
a.) R. Hillel (paraph.): 'If I am only for myself, what kind of jerk am I for?'
b.) People who say 'Charity begins at home.' intend never to practise it anywhere else, and likely not much at home.
b.i.) Waiting until things are just right here—your home, your neighbourhood, your country—before having any particular concern beyond 'here' is a dandy way to avoid ever having to do that.
b.ii.) R. Tarfon: 'It is not your task to complete the work, but neither are you free to desist from it."
3.) Suddenly remembering that what Marx called 'The blinkered self-centredness («Idiotismus») of rural life seems to be held-up as _ideal_ by some people.
Still, the hypocrisy Vance gives to caritas is still preferable to outright hatred of it, whether that's out of a Randroid-adjacent ideology (Thiel, Musk) or from monstrous selfishness (Trump and his media personalities, including Noem and M.T. Greene). Say what you will about Catholicism—please!—it has had its moments of humanism and intelligence, such as the padres' refusal to accede to the conquistadors' demands that they rule the American natives to be soulless, and so _legitmately_ treatable as animals.
"2.) This atheist Jew's gloss on the excellent article on 'Ordo amoris' ":
This lapsed Protestant agrees. And when he got to the part about the fire department and the responsibility of paying taxes to support it--it was "Render unto Caesar" all over again. Which knocks flat tax cuts for billionaires.
PS: I couldn't let "Ordure Amoris" go by unchallenged. JD and Steven Miller want a Ministry of Love.
... counting down until Border Patrol is renamed the Ministry of Welcome
Not a lot of evidence JDV loves his family "first," or at all.
"...what kind of jerk am I for?"
Schitzenführer, obviously.
I woulda just said "off" and been done with it.
It's all so confusing, the headlines said "Heart failure" and the word "failure" suggests Vance's involvement but the word "Heart" does not.
As someone who almost died of heart failure and had my dad, brother and sister die from this, let me say there is no need to bring Jedediah Dangit Vance into this.