Tribute

Tubby's January 6 speech

Why isn’t the Unselect Committee of highly partisan political hacks investigating the CAUSE of the January 6th protest, which was the rigged Presidential Election of 2020?... I will be having a news conference on January 6th at Mar-a-Lago to discuss all of these points, and more. Until then, remember, the insurrection took place on November 3rd, it was the completely unarmed protest of the rigged election that took place on January 6th. — Donald Trump press release, Dec. 21.

I wanna thank the young fella we had up here entertaining you. Poopmouth, his name is. Unusual name. I know a lot of rappers, all the biggest rappers, and I gotta say I don’t agree with many, but this kid is 100% right on the money. Like when he tells you all the things Sleepy Joe Biden can do with himself, ay caramba, very spicy material but 100% and it really warmed up the crowd.

The reporters I noticed weren’t dancing, but we have to expect that, they never change, they never wanna give me a break. We got the real people in here, not as many as we wanted. We had thousands, actually close to a million people wanted to come to this, they were calling from all over the country, but we said, we have to be responsible, nobody is more responsible than me. So, just hotel guests and their immediate family. This is the kind of thing you get at Mar-a-Lago so you high rollers, if you’re watching, keep it in mind.

There’s so much I wanna talk about. So much. I can’t get to it all, because we have a function coming in here later, a beautiful young kid having his Bar Mitzvah, wonderful family, friends of mine actually, and Sheldon Heimrich and his parents Sid and Ethel, wanna say mazel tov, good luck.

One thing I gotta mention, the way these fake news reporters twisted what I said about Israel. I said a lovely thing, a speech really, about Israel, which I love, so much, I put the embassy in Jerusalem, you saw that, many people don’t know, right where the Palestinians have to look at it all the time, which is very important to the nation of Israel. And I said people who don’t love Israel like I do maybe also don’t like the Jewish people so much, and that goes for people who say they’re Jews but don’t love Israel, unlike Sheldon and his parents and all of the Jewish people present here today.

And what did the media do, they tried to make out like that it was me that was against the Jews. But everybody knows what I mean. George Soros is what I mean, OK? And Sulzberger at the New York Times and even Bibi, Bibi Netanyahu, what a traitor he turned out to be, ay yi yi, even to his own country, and I just want to say so you can all hear me because I really mean it, to people like that I say, [pointing at the TV camera] You are Fake Jews.

You know who else is fake, and this is what I really want to get into here: The RINOs who are in bed with the radical socialist Democrats in Congress on the Unselect Committee. What a bunch of losers and unamerican communists, you never saw such losers. And this is why I wanted to do this today, on January 6, because the liars and hypocrites in Congress, they’re having their own thing up on Capitol Hill, with speeches and sad music and acting like it was some kind of disaster and blaming everyone but themselves. But when their people, the Black Lives Matter people, riot in the streets and kill thousands of people, a total slaughter, little kids, grandmas, and you know they rape the grandma before they kill them and make them say Black Lives Matter — they think that’s terrific. They don’t care about your grandmother who Black Lives Matter raped and killed and then they go steal from Walgreens, millions of dollars, you can’t get razor blades or chapstick or anything because of the shoplifting, also supply chain and the price of gas and rape and murder and they make the kids walk on the flag in school, it’s disgusting.

They think it’s terrific, the Black Lives Matter, and meanwhile we have all these wonderful people, these patriotic Americans in jail for January 6 which was nothing, noth-ing, zero. OK, a few people got out of hand, but they did it because they love this country and they saw how the Democrats and the RINOs and the Black Lives Matter stole the election, and it made them mad — or, not mad, just concerned. So they went to Washington and they said to the Capitol Police, “May we please come in?” and the Capitol Police said, “Of course you can, you’re United States citizens,” and they all went in and la di da, everything was fine, until somebody started a panic, we still don’t know who did it but when we get Congress to turn over the tapes, you can take a look, because what I hear is it was Liz Cheney and a couple of her antifa buddies. I have very good information.

But the RINOs and radical Democrats in Congress, and I really don’t know which is worse, they’re persecuting these good Americans, and I want to let our friends in jail or prison know, if they’re watching, to let everyone know, that when I take back the White House they all get pardons, right away, before anyone else, and also —

[He holds up some kind of wallet-sized card.]

— they’ll also get this Titanium Trump Card which comps their rooms at all of my hotels for the rest of their lives. Forever. Now this is very exclusive. They get everything, the room, the pool, the lounge, access to the spa and some of the services, and also there’s an airport shuttle and complimentary breakfast. Because I just want them to know that while Nancy Pe-lousy and Shifty Schiff and the RINOs and commies are lying about what happened last year, I am on their side and the next time they come to Washington, and they will come, they’re not gonna be the ones who get locked up. Alright, there’s the buffet, have a good time everybody.