Dork horse

I'm sick of these goofy-ass candidates

© 2019 Gage Skidmore used under a Creative Commons license


[Sorry it’s late — forgot to push the button! - Ed.]

I saw this in the Washington Times:

Andrew Yang on impeachment: ‘This is going to be a loser’

I have to admit I took it right off the bat as another sign that Yang is a feckless tyro whose candidacy is as much a vanity run as Michael Bloomberg’s. I had at first thought his UBI advocacy was something serious, like Jay Inslee’s climate change cause, and that he would push to get onto the national agenda and then gently take his leave at the appropriate moment. After all, there are stronger candidates who are advancing his other alleged interests.

But over time I began to worry that he had caught the presidential bug because he was acting like a real, if slightly loopy, candidate, bragging on his big campaign haul and slagging the press for not covering him generously enough.

Now to be fair Yang’s not quite the fool the WashTimes tries to make him look, as some of his other quotes show:

“Not a single Republican has given any indication that they’re in fact-finding mode. They’re all in defend-the-president mode,” [Yang] continued. “You need literally dozens of Republican senators to switch sides when the trial starts, which we’ve gotten zero indication is going to happen.”

OK, this isn’t necessarily my POV — I think the Democrats should chuck that bill of particulars at the Senate and make those fuckers reject it — but it’s not the load of Matt Gaetz bullshit the Moonie Times was setting up. But then:

Mr. Yang said he feared that Mr. Trump could wind up being “totally exonerated” if the inquiry drags on for too long.

Totally exonerated! That sounds really stupid, Yang Man. But wait, here’s an account of Yang’s statement from a real paper, the Chicago Tribune:

“If the impeachment (and removal from office) is unsuccessful, you can already see Donald Trump crowing about it. You can see him saying, ‘Totally exonerated. It was a witch hunt just like I said all along,’” Yang said...

Rather different, eh? God, the Washington Times sucks.

But then Yang goes on to say some genuinely goofy-ass things:

“To me the biggest drawback of impeachment is that Donald Trump is a creature who thrives on attention and impeachment is attention...”

Oh wow, so if we try and convict him we’ll just be giving him what he wants! I guess the Constitution only applies to introverts.

“Even if it seems like it’s bad for him, he’s winning. We have to take every opportunity to make our case for a more positive vision for the country that America can get excited about. That’s how we’re going to beat him in 2020,” Yang said.

Who’s we?

I take back what I said about Yang catching the bug. He’s basically a gentleman-dabbler who figures why not run for President, I know as much as the next guy and I have enough managerial smarts and connections to get an organization running that can game the Democrats’ idiotic system and put me on national TV with the other goofball candidates, and some of those disenchanted multitudes who LOL-nothing-matters’d Trump into office will see me there and think, what the hell, I’ll support this guy, because that’ll be making a statement and the best part is I don’t have to be responsible or invested in what happens next November and over the ensuing, last few years of America. because no way in hell this guy’s gonna win.

I also take back what I said about Yang being Michael Bloomberg — he’s more like Ross Perot: an unqualified rich guy who doesn’t really give a shit.