It seems our Super Hero Iron Man president is going into Walter Reed for his annual physical only 5 months after his last annual physical. I know they say the years get shorter as you grow older, but this is ridiculous.
i cannot imagine the thought processes leading to the interlocutions that this malignant narcissist (with almost infinite power and influence when it comes to his physical wellbeing) has with the medical elite in charge of that leather pouch of dung and oily entrails.
I’ll be looking forward to the results. Why, the very spiders in his sty are spelling out “TERRIFIC PIG”. He’s as healthy as a horse and bathed in buttermilk!
Occasionally, I'll sit through an entire Trump diatribe. Whether it's for the anthropology, a desire to see a living recreation of Germany c. 1934, or because I'm insane, I watched Trump's speech to the UN, the entire Hegseth/Trump harangue to the military brass, and all of yesterday's reification of Antifa. For the latter, not only Trump and his despicable henchpeople but also the troupe of right-wing grifters they assembled to enhance the performance put on quite a show. It's oddly fascinating to see them lie with such contempt for us all, and we will not see a shittier bunch of people deciding our collective fates.
And I have to say, your piece here was not only wickedly stiletto-sharp, but tragic, because at that insane meeting yesterday Trump did not collapse to be carried off. Your works always have much happier endings than reality. I'll remember these fondly after Trump and his mob arrest us for calling them fascists.
“Maxwell? I haven’t heard that name in a long time.” “Habeus- what’s that?” Either Trump’s hearing is even worse than mind or his aural processing ability has dropped to bored teen level. There’s no question he’s not calling the shots now. Half the time he doesn’t even know there are any shots. The Fascist Cirklejerks (no, you can’t have that for a band name) are hoping he doesn’t die before he preemptively pardons them. Maybe they should be buttering up Vance.
"Of course when I’m gone you’ll be gone too, all of you."
Insert Soviet joke: Every morning, guy buys copy of Pravda, glances at Page 1, throws paper away. News vendor asks why. "I'm looking for an obituary." "But obituaries aren't on Page 1." "The one I'm looking for will be."
Replace "newspaper" with "internet": Every morning, I'm checking to see if he's gone.Though now if the happy day comes, I hear Bondi: "Nothing happened... and if you saw anything you didn’t see it!"
Streussven Von Millvoughter, the two-headed Reichskanzler, is rushing to get all the pieces in place before it asks the Sinister Six to finally come clean and toss out that pesky constitution. Then it will grant itself full plenary* authority.
Until then, the cabal is pumping Tubby full of hamberders, Adderall and fawning praise. Whatever’s required to prop up this facade of leadership and keep his cult on board.
(*My new favorite word. Did anyone else see Miller’s gaffe and his dorky moment of deer-in-the-headlights panic before CNN washed it away?)
I did. He just went strangely silent. "Stephen...? Stephen...?" the interviewer said. Someone said Miller was pretending it was a technical glitch, but he couldn't be bothered to mimic silent speaking. He just stood there, as though backstage waiting to be introduced. Fuck CNN, by the way.
Hey, anybody else see that bit in the Oval, Wrestler Lady was there, "We gotta $500 million deal with Harvard, right Linda?" She nods, then he says, "Just gotta get it down on paper" and she mumbles, "Yeah, paper."
Because that's how these high-level deals work, right? You work it out all verbal-like, and then somebody says, "Hey, we should write this all down ON PAPER."
And I actually googled Harvard before posting this just to check, of course there's no deal but sometimes I doubt my own grasp of reality. Because if the President of the United States lied to all of us about there being a deal, that would be a news story on its own, right?
Well, there's deals and the there's Trump "deals". Getting it on paper is supposed to turn a "deal" into a deal, but its just a "deal" on paper, if you follow me.
So Donny's nominee for Head of the Office of Special Counsel was traveling with a female colleague/subordinate and canceled her hotel room and made her stay in his room.
This would have seemed great to me when I was like 10
Lol, "Grovers Corners".
I was Mr Webb(Emily's dad) and Professor Pierson in a couple productions of "Our Town".
This repetition of Fascism is farcical: brutal and abusive and absurd: but often hilarious..,
Our Town, The Sequel: Sundowning In A Sundown Town
Less Grover's Corners and more Peyton Place
Wasn't Grovers Corners where the first Martian shell landed?
In 1938 it was Grovers Mills
It seems our Super Hero Iron Man president is going into Walter Reed for his annual physical only 5 months after his last annual physical. I know they say the years get shorter as you grow older, but this is ridiculous.
We went decimal a long time ago. So 5 months - that’s half a decade!
Feels like it, anyway.
i cannot imagine the thought processes leading to the interlocutions that this malignant narcissist (with almost infinite power and influence when it comes to his physical wellbeing) has with the medical elite in charge of that leather pouch of dung and oily entrails.
I’ll be looking forward to the results. Why, the very spiders in his sty are spelling out “TERRIFIC PIG”. He’s as healthy as a horse and bathed in buttermilk!
It has ALWAYS been 2026!
"Of course when i'm gonna you'll be gone too, all of you."
<Oh my god. He admit it.> gif
This was excellent. Just the right mix of funny and nightmarish.
We,'re all just NPC's in Donald Trump's Game of Life. That makes sense.
These are appearing all over my neighborhood.
https://substack.com/profile/870651-worriedman/note/c-164545706?r=insr
Uh... the stiff-arm way he's holding out that light bulb... I'll check with the ADL about whether it's just an excess of enthusiasm.
Is that a Nazi salute in your pants or are you just glad to see me?
Puts a whole new spin on “I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas”…
Hey now – it's only mid-October!
Occasionally, I'll sit through an entire Trump diatribe. Whether it's for the anthropology, a desire to see a living recreation of Germany c. 1934, or because I'm insane, I watched Trump's speech to the UN, the entire Hegseth/Trump harangue to the military brass, and all of yesterday's reification of Antifa. For the latter, not only Trump and his despicable henchpeople but also the troupe of right-wing grifters they assembled to enhance the performance put on quite a show. It's oddly fascinating to see them lie with such contempt for us all, and we will not see a shittier bunch of people deciding our collective fates.
And I have to say, your piece here was not only wickedly stiletto-sharp, but tragic, because at that insane meeting yesterday Trump did not collapse to be carried off. Your works always have much happier endings than reality. I'll remember these fondly after Trump and his mob arrest us for calling them fascists.
"Are you going to declare Antifa an foreign terrorist organization?" provoked some great senile confusion for the old turd.
Thank you!
KAMPFERT!!!
Next up: Ray Coniff and his Orchestra and Chorus! Get ready for wordless vocals bop bop bopping out your favorite pop hits!
I’ve always wanted to hear 101 Strings do “YMCA”.i
“Maxwell? I haven’t heard that name in a long time.” “Habeus- what’s that?” Either Trump’s hearing is even worse than mind or his aural processing ability has dropped to bored teen level. There’s no question he’s not calling the shots now. Half the time he doesn’t even know there are any shots. The Fascist Cirklejerks (no, you can’t have that for a band name) are hoping he doesn’t die before he preemptively pardons them. Maybe they should be buttering up Vance.
Vance does his own buttering, right before he heads over to that naughty, naughty leather sectional.
The midcentury modern equivalent. If it were a person, it would carry a riding crop. https://www.1stdibs.com/furniture/seating/sofas/mid-century-modern-pair-of-swedish-oak-cognac-leather-sofas-k-e-ekselius/id-f_33989252/
Ooh, sexy!
Naughty Naugahyde
"Of course when I’m gone you’ll be gone too, all of you."
Insert Soviet joke: Every morning, guy buys copy of Pravda, glances at Page 1, throws paper away. News vendor asks why. "I'm looking for an obituary." "But obituaries aren't on Page 1." "The one I'm looking for will be."
Replace "newspaper" with "internet": Every morning, I'm checking to see if he's gone.Though now if the happy day comes, I hear Bondi: "Nothing happened... and if you saw anything you didn’t see it!"
Streussven Von Millvoughter, the two-headed Reichskanzler, is rushing to get all the pieces in place before it asks the Sinister Six to finally come clean and toss out that pesky constitution. Then it will grant itself full plenary* authority.
Until then, the cabal is pumping Tubby full of hamberders, Adderall and fawning praise. Whatever’s required to prop up this facade of leadership and keep his cult on board.
(*My new favorite word. Did anyone else see Miller’s gaffe and his dorky moment of deer-in-the-headlights panic before CNN washed it away?)
I did. He just went strangely silent. "Stephen...? Stephen...?" the interviewer said. Someone said Miller was pretending it was a technical glitch, but he couldn't be bothered to mimic silent speaking. He just stood there, as though backstage waiting to be introduced. Fuck CNN, by the way.
Miller has basically no media skills, yet he keeps putting himself out there.
You VILL vatch und you VILL like it!
Wait, someone caught him NOT talking and that's not the news story of the century?
Hey, anybody else see that bit in the Oval, Wrestler Lady was there, "We gotta $500 million deal with Harvard, right Linda?" She nods, then he says, "Just gotta get it down on paper" and she mumbles, "Yeah, paper."
Because that's how these high-level deals work, right? You work it out all verbal-like, and then somebody says, "Hey, we should write this all down ON PAPER."
And I actually googled Harvard before posting this just to check, of course there's no deal but sometimes I doubt my own grasp of reality. Because if the President of the United States lied to all of us about there being a deal, that would be a news story on its own, right?
Taking notes on a criminal conspiracy??
Well, there's deals and the there's Trump "deals". Getting it on paper is supposed to turn a "deal" into a deal, but its just a "deal" on paper, if you follow me.
[Nods along in agreement, as if any of this makes any sense]
„We have always been at war with Grovers Corners.“ Some wise guy said that
Was I the only one who laughed out loud at "Work twenty-four-seventeen"? Sometimes I like to get a read on how abnormal I am.
Yes you were.
Just as I suspected.
I'll admit that I didn't actually laugh out loud, but I audibly snorted at that line.
Math alert! https://bsky.app/profile/chicagodomdaddy.bsky.social/post/3m2rsdahdnc25
Math checks out.
"BONDI reaches down to his crotch; her arm moves rhythmically."
I first read this as 'her' crotch. Also possible I suppose.
Blondi jerks on the 1 and 3
Also the name of Hitler's dog, BTW. Oh no, did I just compare Tubby to Hitler? Will someone shoot Charlie Kirk AGAIN?
She's jerking bass
Another someone who used to give endless, pointless, rambling speeches everyone was forced to sit through:
"El Maximo Lider", Fidel Castro.
Same thing, except we don't get the consolation of Buena Vista Social Club and streets full of 50's Chevys.
"BONDI: [To NOEM] Back off, bitch!"
Pretty sure this part is for realz. If only we could all be flies on the wall...
Remember when Palin was the alleged "hot" Republican woman? Ahh, those were the days...
So Donny's nominee for Head of the Office of Special Counsel was traveling with a female colleague/subordinate and canceled her hotel room and made her stay in his room.
This would have seemed great to me when I was like 10