178 Comments
Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

A few points...

Well the joke's on us-all, those of us who thought the post-Bennet and Weiss era that the Times' opinion operation would be an improvement.

If the role French is to play at the Times is never-true conservatives then maybe he doubles as a humor columnist because how those people dance around the idea that Trump is bad while GOP policies are fine cracks me up. Then again, may that's, like, a my problem, that I find that funny. May not be a universal thing?

Meanwhile... If only ~55% of Times subscribers are there for news as opposed to cooking, games, the Athletic, etc., what percentage of the ~55 care about the opinion side? That's rhetorical question because I doubt the numbers out there. The said, I'm sure it's relatively small. But then split that number into categories -- libs, conservatives, "independents", etc. -- and I'd hazard to guess approximately no one cares about French's hiring -- too few to matter, other than Roy, of course (not a dig).

Meanwhile, I was so hopeful that the House was reconvening Wednesday night for a seventh vote but being a cohort suffering #smalldickenergy*, all they managed to do was adjourned. (*Warned y'all.)

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

I have a subscription, but I guess I don't have that extra-special subscription that allows me to read the recipes. Which is OK, most of their recipes seem to start with "Take one cup of heavy cream..." They even had a recipe that starts with a pan full of bubbling hot heavy cream, drizzle beaten eggs into it, the best scrambled eggs you ever had! Well, sure, who can't make stuff taste good when you start with a big wallop of pure fat, a substance humans are hard-wired to love? Give me some cream and I'll make you the best damn bowl of corn flakes you ever had.

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The recipes are good!

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

They are!

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

As a child when dad milked a Jersey cow, I can confirm that breakfast cereal with cream is fantastic. Also incredibly rich (do not attempt with adult gall bladder or metabolism).

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You say "take one cup of heavy cream..." like that's a bad thing.

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"And call me in the morning..."

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Well, everyone knows that the only reason people hate GOP policies is the mean tweets. Once King Toad is gone and they get a fresh coat of paint and some expensive PR, we'll see turning America into The Hunger Games Handmaid's Tale is really a net positive for all of us!

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Remember the good ol' days when what we rightly hated was the mean streets? Now we're all a-feared of mean tweets...how far we've fallen...

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Okay, I know all of this. But does he honestly think older children are cheaper or something? I clearly missed that weirdness the first time I saw he'd said it.

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Jan 5, 2023·edited Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Great observation! As I said below, reasonableness is not French’s long suit.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

And to those ^^ points, one does wonder about the next big Supreme Court decision*: "OK godboys – you take all the tax receipts and git 'er** done!"

*I'm making this up. But via the Frenchys of the world we are likely to get something like this.

**And by that I mean each and every purported function*** of government

***to be determined exclusively**** by the godboys

****because exclusion is their central function*****

*****sorry for all these

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"reasonableness is not French’s long suit..."

Heck, French is still working on long pants...

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While masquerading as sans culottes.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Not only that, but the paltriness of the amounts themselves -- you can bet that neither French nor anyone he knows has spent so little to maintain a child in any month regardless of the age of the child.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Which paltriness is why what they really wanna do is get control of the Treasury. Then, inverse Jubilee!

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Well, that'd explain the continued press to build prisons.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

NOT slavery! Free-market competition!

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

These are the same people who think the poor survived for months on their COVID stimulus, yet 150k a year is middle class. <include bananajoke.lib>

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Well, okay, but if Biden engineered a way to pay families a monthly $350 per child under age 12 -- that would be huge. It means essentially feeding that kid for the month. But that is also why it's a moronic suggestion. Biden even with a Democratic congress would hardly be able to pass anything so ambitious -- which means French isn't going to find even two Republican pro-life reps who'd vote for it, and he knows that. Tar him. Feather him. Carry him out of town on a pole.

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Tar is enough.

Save the boids!

And I can always find a better use for a sturdy pole.

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Haha, Bern shouting from the center of the mob, "Use a flimsy pole!"

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2 marks!

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Well, on one hand you got diapers. On the other hand- there's car insurance.

Unless you've got one of those Palin style Teen Moms- then you've got the worst of both worlds.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Diaper insurance?

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Children having children! It's $350 a month ALL THE WAY DOWN.

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$350 kidlets dispensed automat-style is why USA phukyah! But keeping the machines stocked is gonna be a logistical challenge.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Maybe he thinks it's a way to wean you off the government teat because the number is going to zero when they hit 18.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

"the number is going to zero when they hit 18"

Well there's the problem! Who in their right mind would have 18??!!

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The Mormons and the Catholics would like a word...

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Which one? 'Cause I gotta zillion of 'em...

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It's because that once a child turns 7, it's time to teach them a trade...

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Once they get rid of contraception and gay marriage, it'll be time to take a look at those burdensome child labor laws.

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So THAT's what we do with burdensome children...I learn something new at this-here stack every day!

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"At four I went to Hebrew School, at ten I learned a trade..."

Just shows they want to take us back to a time before the progressive child-labor laws of 19th century Russia.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Although they were not referring to French, someone on Twitter made an interesting tangential point, about MAGA/Trump. They asserted that not only is Trump’s influence ebbing, but that he never had as much influence *personally* as people believed – that his primary function was to remove political inhibitions and to show right-wingers what was possible *without* wearing a mask of civility, and he was exalted for revealing that tactic as viable.

So I agree French along with a lot of anti-Trumpers oppose Trump and Trumpism primarily on the basis of tactics – French believes the Right can win more victories with honey than with vinegar (and of course that French personally can profit from positioning himself this way). But make no mistake, honey or vinegar, the goal is the same.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Looking back, I think it might have been a mistake to think of it as a cult, no matter how cult-like it appeared. Yes, of course they forgive and excuse anything Trump does, including breaking the law, and that does seem cult-ish (to paraphrase George Santos). But that was always a reaction to liberal outrage, and a way of pushing our buttons: "Oh, you're mad he took some classified documents? Well, how 'bout WE DON'T CARE? How 'bout them apples, huh?" In the end it's impossible to separate "Love of Trump" from "Hatred of Libs" and know what percentage each got, not that anyone should actually care.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Like everything else these days, 51-49...(if not 50.1-49.9)

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Yeah, I’m not yet ready to relegate Trump to the category of Spent Force, because I think he still stands a slim chance of getting the GOP nomination in 2024, and he absolutely could function as a spoiler if he runs third party. There is definitely a die-hard group of cultists who won’t desert him, but I’m starting to be persuaded that their numbers are shrinking.

I mean, whether or not you believe the election was stolen, the fact remains that it is 2023 and Joe Biden is sitting in the Oval Office, not Donald Trump. Most of those who thought they could overturn the election in January 2021 or who kept predicting dates when Trump would return triumphant to reclaim the Presidency and place Biden under arrest have got to be losing some confidence by now.

Plus, Trump *looks* defeated – he’s in so much legal jeopardy (in theory, anyway) from so many different investigations, he’s lost the patina of invincibility he once had.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Whatever happens with Trump, we can rest safe in the knowledge that one thing will never fade away: Their hatred of US*.

*pun intended.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Oh, if only they took "Love it or leave it" personally.

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America: Love it or burn it to the fucking ground, starting with the House of Representatives.

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Jan 5, 2023·edited Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Heated heartily for "Spent Force"! 2 marks!

Edit to add Hearted heatily!

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That "patina" was mostly skin bronzer anyway

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Trump's media presence is ebbing, not his influence. His biggest problem is he has nothing to run for, no excuse for rallies and interviews. We should expect more stunts like the NFT thing that keeps the pot boiling until 2024. Like Ahnald, he'll be Bach. His example was crucial in assembling the Nihilist Caucus in the House, but none of them can inspire insane loyalty on the scale needed for state wide or national office that Trump does. Guys like Abbott and DeSantis are trying, but it remains to be seen what theyve got when it's time to put up or shut up.

I believe the anti-Trumpers are anti for 2 reasons: most importantly they see that Trump is out for himself alone which hits their grifting options (game recognize game), but also many realize the value and need for the "reasonable" mask. Trump has proven you can reliably win primaries rigged to favor the most passionate voters, but also proven you can't win generals by focusing on your rabid base, outside of a few greenhouses. You don't wield power by losing the general. Note that style and manners have no role in this evaluation, it's all about results. Anit-Trumpers could give a fuck about style and manners if it produces results for them and their interests.

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Exactly, all the pearl-clutching you saw back in 2016 was based on an assumption that Trump's manifest awfulness was losing them votes, and that Trump himself would lose. Him winning shut them up for a while, til well-justified anxiety about the 2018 midterms took hold, then it was back to the fainting couch.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

I need to keep reminding myself of what the NYT really is, so I will stop being surprised when it does something like this.

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I like (not!) the non-sequitur of “government too big, no respect, therefore BUNDY RANCH! QED LIBZ! More of the same, tired blaming Dems for the crap the whack jobs pull. The “reasonable conservative” seems to lack the “reasonable” part.

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Jan 5, 2023·edited Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Fuck I hate Bundys. Is the old man dead yet? Seems overdue.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

I have a spare prayer slot suddenly. I'll see what I can do.

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Bless you Sister.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

From your mouth to God's ear.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

THAT is a vision I heartily endorse!

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Well, goddess yo -- we're talking about Nemesis here...

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Get the Erinyes and the Norns on the phone, just in case you need mop-up.

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And then the febreeze?

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Is it a Big, Black Nemesis, does it engage in parthenogenesis?

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No one move a muscle as the dead come home

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I think Al is still kicking along with Peg and Bud and the one that starred as a person with her first name

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

I'm sorry, was letting your ragged, neglected cows graze on federal land for free* not enough for you? We'll try to do better.

*I know, we're supposed to charge you for it, and did in fact send you a bill, which you then refused to pay, which led to the recent unpleasantness with your pals aiming high-powered rifles at federal agents, but then we dropped the whole thing, so can we be friends again?

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Oh, is there ain't nothin' more grandish

Than gettin' us chances to brandish?

Them Feds forced a standoff

'Cause Bundy don't handoff

No cash – so we cosplay outlandish!

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More “logic”: the gubmint should be smaller! Everyone should pay their own way with bootstraps and such! GIMME MY FREE GRAZING LANDS!

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Fun to think about the brain that backs Bundy's opposition to overbearing government (because govt forces charged him a fee to graze on govt land) but decries BLM's opposition to overbearing govt (because govt forces beat and kill citizens).

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Hearted for your idea of fun!

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Everything French believes is perfectly within the law (Wilhoit's Law, that is.)

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Same old vapid shit. He looks like someone that writes vapid shit. Remember when, for one brief day, he was the man most qualified to be president? Like what were they going to do? Elect Trump?

You think he might start hanging out with Brooksie and get a hankerin' for some of that hot young research assistant stuff ?

("Hankerin'" is a great word!) Remember when Frenchie told his wife she couldn't drink or use Facebook while he was away at war I guess because she couldn't be trusted. There was talk of a chastity belt.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Link, please?

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author

The contretemps was discussed in an update to this post: https://alicublog.blogspot.com/2016/05/pardon-my-french.html

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Those were the days!

Misty and watercolored. We thought they'd never end. We were young and sure to have our way.

That does seem like ages ago.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

When everything was depicted* in black and White.

*That is a particularly crunchy word.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

OMG, yes - I'd totally forgotten that. Thanks!

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Hearted for hankerin'

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

The NYT and WaPo think they have to provide pseudoconservative opinions to keep their reactionary readers happy, since it isn’t every day a Whitewater bullshit fountain, fake WMD fable or Hillary email shocker comes along to bring that pseudoconservatism onto the front page. With the coming two years of House Republican dysfunction, it makes sense the NYT would bring on an asshole like French to divert the asshole wing of their readership, so fewer of them are driven by the “biased media” reporting of reality to cancel their subscriptions or, worse yet, withdraw their ad revenue.

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Speaking of all that, anybody heard from Maggie Haberman lately, now that it looks lik she deliberately sat on evidence that a coup was in the works? I realize these are different editorial departments, but yo...

Also now House Republicans are throwing themselves onto the pitch over popcorn emojis in tweets...

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

With soundtrack by Hot Buttered!

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Nice -- one of my favorite songs ever. I like to imagine the vacuum tubes in those old synths actually glowing with heat

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I about wore out my 45 of "Popcorn" back in the day.

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We've been known to use it on unruly neighbors. On repeat.

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The highest and best use of that bit of pop culture tripe.

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We like it. But we're also a big fan of Plastic Bertrand's Ping Pong.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

et viola!

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David French's: Yellow mustard or yellow journalism?

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

You dog!

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Why must I feel like that....

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Don’t be such a brat! (Wurst pun ever.)

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You gotta dance with them whut brat ya!

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French is another 'Velvet Hammer', aka how to get fucked gently with a chainsaw. His pretty, thoughtful words wash over the MSM masses who might have the attention span for a 4 minute read (the NYT new snagbait tool, which I detest) while few dig deeper into his true stance on the issues.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

I kinda like that "4 minute read" feature, it lets me know exactly how much time I'm saving by not reading David Brooks, "Lessee... what should I do with my four extra minutes?"

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I foresee a new Geico "15 minutes" commercial. "In the time it takes you to skip 4 David Brooks columns..."

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Minute_Men

Hundred years later, still propaganda.

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That... is not what I expected that link to be. Can't believe I didn't know about that, though. Thanks.

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Hey, for some of us, four minutes is MORE THAN ENOUGH.

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I considered at length to opportunity to say something inane about the 4 minutes, then decided I'd leave it to others. Thanks for not letting me down.

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I'm not judging. It just wasn't what I expected the link to be.

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Fun read, tho...

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Interesting, but on an admitted tangent - Creel / Wilson were NOT the first to create a government propaganda unit by any means - it was without any shadow of doubt David Lloyd George in 1915, long before the US entered the war. This is the problem with Wikipedia I guess ;) *signed, PhD Hons in British History / Politics. #merika

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

What the hell might French actually know about the history of farming (and the historic need for Government intervention in the markets to keep the US fed)?

The little noticed decisions by the likes of Nixon's Earl Butz (he of the "tight pussy, loose shoes, and warm place to shit") that chose mega farming and corporate Ag, instead of the European model (keep a stratum of small farms as a social good), the subsidies for corn and sugar, the politicization of farmers in the politics of grievance, these are right wing actions...

French is bloody awful, and the NYTimes is implicitly endorsing his views by publication.

I wanted the Times to be as good as they claim, and not that they think they are better than the readership...

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Both Big Ag and the NYT (Big Gag) are corporatized. Ça c'est le point entier, Frenchy.

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Jan 5, 2023·edited Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

But what does he need to know? Rural folk FEEL put-upon by anyone not-rural, isn't that enough? Sure, you could help out those poor farmers in Iowa by buying a 55 gallon drum of high-fructose corn syrup, but you REFUSE to, you heartless bastard.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Do NOT forget the rural folks' urban brethren at the Monongahela Metal Foundry – "Casting steel ingots with the housewife in mind."

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Listening to Washington Journal. I'm starting to wonder when someone makes it explicit that they're waiting to be offered a white guy. I'm not liking my country that much right now.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

What's the over/under on the number of columns he writes before the Times publishes one so stupid or ridiculously offensive (editors? lol) that it causes an internet uproar, at which point we are flooded in "Dark Web" teardrops over his "cancellation?"

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Nah. French has got the winsome act down. If he does drop a deuce he'll just whine about how uncivil his critics are and get fluffed by every trimmer in Christendom.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Wait. Isn't there some grooming to be worked in there somewhere intermediately?

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

To be fair, French will fill a gaping ideological lacuna in the Times editorial roster since he is so radically different from David Brooks. I can only hope they team up for many op-ed colloquies -- they could finish each other's sentences:

David: "We need to create a country in which all of these really diverse communities — some of them centered around real..."

David: "...convictions whether on the far-right or the far-left — we need to build a culture that accommodates..."

David: "...diverse points of view as long as those views are right down the middle."

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Hearted for the wholedamnthing.

Also "gaping lacuna" is NOT my new band name, but I will file it in my "rhymes to be use later" folder that includes "big kahuna" and "eat more tuna".

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Oh, if only there were more than one, and then we could use "lacunae", which is just lovely.

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Now that Benedict's done with the paping

We can all get back to our vaping

And eat the big tunae

With same-sized kahunae

Their mouths, like lacunae, gaping

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

I always get him mixed up with David Frum (Frum&French, French&Frum, let's call the whole thing off.)

And speaking of David Frum (how's that for a segue?) he was giving us all a history lesson on MSNBC yesterday about the 1923 battle for Speaker (which, just coincidentally, also involved Republicans). Frum's just-so story is that, back in the day, Republicans had real policy differences between rural Republicans and northern big-city Republicans, and because their differences were over policy, they were amenable to negotiation, and the conflict could eventually be resolved.

But this new crowd today? This minority, this Never-Kevin caucus, they're just nihilists, they don't have any principles or any policy ideas, how can one negotiate with such people?

And being David Frum, he neglected to mention that Kevin doesn't have any principles or policy ideas either, that nihilism is endemic to the Republican party now, it's not isolated within a minority of 20. Which, come to think of it, is exactly the sleight-of-hand that Mr. French pulls. I'll go back to not bothering to tell the difference between them.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Fish-lipped weasel David Frum can fk off forever for his role in Bush administration propaganda and the Iraq War.

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Or, to put it in a slightly different way, "Guaranteed slot on Liberal MSNBC any time he wants it."

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Goddammit. I'd just successfully forgotten Frum existed.

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Hearted for your, uhmm...memory?

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Dissociation. We can forget nearly anything in two hours.

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And if we work together, we can forget twice as much!

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While plenty shitty, the Freedom Caucus feels Kevin McCarthy could be shittier.

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Outside the context of American politics, but into the whole wide world: what, in the entire history of the world, has "conservatism" done to contribute to human prosperity and happiness? Nothing. Not one fucking thing. Ever.

Conservative governments can't balance a budget. They can't improve the lives of their citizens. They hate "outsiders." They wage wars. They make life miserable for the many while the rich get richer...

[Sorry, this is your actual Life interrupting your no doubt insightful comments on whatever, but your ex and your kid are having some kind of dispute that it seems only you, Rick, can resolve. We here at Life suggest that you wrap this up and attend to business. We also think you could probably use the distraction. And, "They wage wars"? Jesus, Rick, get a fucking Life, will you?]

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Carry on, carry on.

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Well, the most important thing is they reap profits for the shareholders, that's what. Is there anything more they ought to be worried about?

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I can think of some things, but they're gonna happen in the wrong order. The shame will come last.

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French's fanboys think nodding sagely at his unlikely suggestion mothers/parents might be supported financially gets them off the hook for being greedy selfish assholes without having to actually, you know, DO anything. It's all about feeling good, not about accomplishing anything.

Which reminds me: it's always projection with these shitheads. Look for them to be doing pretty much anything they accuse their enemies of doing.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

Hand-waving vaguely in the direction of some support for parents, you might even call it a form of virtue-signaling.

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Jan 5, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso

The hand-waving is only because they can't be bothered to memorize the secret handshake.

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I'm sure he and Douthat will have plenty of suggestions that their fellow conservatives will be happy to ignore.

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