67 Comments

I really want to see this staged live. Roy is definitely wasting his time and talent by not becoming America's greatest playwright!

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“Feast Day,” “Opus Duh,” “A Few Drinks After Work,” “Solving the World’s Problems,” and “Get Out the Metal Rulers.”

There's yer body o'work, me boyo! Pulitzer needs to step up!

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Add my vote to that! I was thinking the same thing. String these episodes together - a coherent plot doesn't matter, given the cast of characters - and BRAVO!

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"a coherent plot doesn't matter, given the cast of characters"

So, a Tarantino film, then?

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I'm thinkin' more Sergio Leone:

"For A Few Crypto More"

Let me know when you have the initial investment ready lined up – in the mean time, let's talk cast this sucka! I'm open to suggestion, but we gotta get Tim Roth in there somewhere.

I'll have my people tiktok your people.

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Follow the august precedent of S.J. Perelman, who did just that (i.e. strung together some of his best humor pieces) in a play he wrote for Bert Lahr called "The Beauty Part." (Alas, it wasn't much of a success, but there was a newspaper strike on.)

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100% agree, and I’ll put in a good word to have Rod Dreher make another cameo appearances at the rectory. He’s qualified, as he’s also a Catholic-adjacent religious nutjob, and anyone whose immediate reaction to the Tucker Carlson firing was “Great! Now he can run for President on the ticket with DeSantis” deserves a slot as Guest Buffoon in this rogue’s gallery.

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OMG! Did Dreher actually say that?

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Not only did he say it, he thought it would be so brilliant a political maneuver that he released his endorsement as a free Substack post to the masses, lol. The man is so consistently wrong about everything it's almost impressive.

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People don't like the shit sandwich that is DeSantis, the answer is to pair it up with Tucker Carlson, diarrhea milkshake.

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Disgusting. And true.

Carlson/DeSantis 2024: Fascists are so nice we did it twice

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I'm interested in this trend of picking truly awful people to run for office. And when I say "awful" I don't just mean that I don't like them, or they favor policies I oppose, I expect that from Republicans. But just objectively awful people who show open contempt for most other people and who obviously delight in hurting others. Why would these be seen as winning qualities in politics, which is still, in the end, a popularity contest? But they are.

In the past, there was usually some effort to leaven the worst qualities of right-wing candidates, Reagan's desire to cut school lunches was obscured by his sunny disposition, even the Nazis felt a need to soften Hitler's image with stories about his love of dogs. But not any more. "Yep, I'm just as awful as I look, maybe even worse, if you want me to be!"

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Whitey Boots and Nut(sack) Job – They'll Do Their Damnedest!

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According to Dreher Carlson's battling "the Cathedral," see. Certainly voters will be animated by this down-to-earth world-view.

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Now that we all know it's just because Carlson called his lady boss the c-word, does this change anything for Dreher? LOL, of course not.

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Long Day’s Journey Into Night meets Duck Soup

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All I can say is like many others, I am in a state of stunned surprise as there are now *two* SCOTUS Justices embroiled in pay-to-play scandals, but *neither* of them is Brett Kavanaugh. Didn’t see that one coming.

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To be clear...

In the cases of Thomas, Gorsuch and maybe Blackout Brett, it's all less bribery, more payments for services rendered. Those guys don't need bribes to decide the way they do.

Now, Roberts, that's maybe bribing.

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It's like a lazy, corrupt cop who gets a few bucks to look the other way while some mob guys empty out a Brinks truck. He'd probably fail to do his job anyway because he's lazy and also a coward, but it's still bribery.

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Not at all. They decide the cases the way they would anyway. no bribery required. So payment for past services rendered.

Roberts' wife's business is essentially a means for bribing him.

Now, everyone on SCOTGOP that signed off on Dobbs and that OSHA case (to name two) should be impeached on substantive grounds. Those decisions, and a shit ton of others, were based on everything but the law; just dictatorial fiat. Then again, as apparatchiks of an anti-democratic party, no better can be expected.

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"Well, the problem as I see it, Mr. Bennett, is all the strange young men what talks on the computer about everybody gettin’ replaced with a theory. Time was when ye had a fella like that, ye sent him away someplace to lick envelopes where no one could see him. But now they’re all you see! Them and that Trump fella."

*choke!* Good lord, that makes sense!

Anyway. All this Hibernian bashing takes back to when America was truly great -- the 1850s.

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The horrifying thing is realizing there's an actual Peggy Noonan column somewhere that it's based on.

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Maybe the next one!

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Nooners is going to achieve fame and fortune with a version of the hat with the can holders and the straw, but for wine boxes.

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The beauty of Hibernians is even in mockery their gift for gab shines thru.

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I’m gonna print this out and hang it on my wall cause its feckin brilliant!

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This was excellent. Thanks!.

You'd think Bill and Boof would bond.

Degenerate gamblers have a lot in common!

My favorite Irish joke would make a good Boof joke. -

Boof was visiting Ireland with his wife. On the third day they split up their sightseeing. Mrs. Boof went to by lace and Boof fulfilled a lifelong dream and visited the Guiness brewery.

Mrs. Boof came back late that afternoon

With yards and yards of handmade lace she planned on turning into curtains for their dining room back home in Virginia.

It was almost 6 and Boof hadn't returned from his adventures.. Mrs. Boof was getting ready to call him when there was a knock on the door. It was the hotel manager and another man she hadn't met. The manager says " Ma'm, we've got terrible news. "

The second man steps forward and removes his hat. " Ma'm , I'm the manager at the Guiness Brewery. On a tour today your husband fell into a tank of

Stout and drowned."

" My God" says Mrs. Boof," was it quick?"

" Not exactly - he got out 4 times to take a piss."

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A happy ending for Boof and everyone else!

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Love the joke, but getting out to piss shows a level of consideration for others not previously seen in Brett Kavanaugh.

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Yesterday Roy channeled Bret Bedbug Stephens. Today it’s James Joyce, or maybe Beckett. From the sublimely ridiculous to the ridiculously sublime.

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More like Tom Stoppard, I’d say.

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I'll throw in a side of Finley Peter Dunne.

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History repeats itself, first as tragedy, then as farce

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Put me down for Brendan Behan.

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Just magnificent. The more I read, even the characters other than Bennett developed an Irish accent in my head, and the more I wished I had three fingers of something (not pudding) to enhance the experience and take me back to the Irish Rep of my youth. The appearance of the Crazy Jesus Lady was just swell. This piece might be expanded into a full-length production, where Tucker is the character always talked about but never seen or heard, sort of like a Quare Fellow for wingnuts, executed by the now leftist Murdochs to appease the Deep State, or something.

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Now I'm imagining a fashy version of "Waiting For Godot"

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I thought the old hag would head straight for the bar.

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She's got a bottle in the linen closet.

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"She's got linen in the bottle closet."

Fixed

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LOL, yes, I like yours better.

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"Oh no, thse Demmy-crats is feelin’ their oats and thirstin’ for blood. They might start askin’ impertinent questions."

I love it: you got Bloated Bill Bennett channeling Mr. Dooley!

And I didn't anticipate the ethanol scented arrival of the Magic Dolphins Lady...

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Why couldn't it end with Kavanaugh cutting off his fingers because he don' wanna be pals wi' Billy Barr no more?

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"Long Day's Journey Into Naught"

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I saw your O’Neill reference after I had made a similar one. I wasn’t intending to copycat!

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Hate when that happens to me. But great minds....

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God hlep me, I missed these guys.

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Gotta work a joke in there about the evil progression from transubstanciation to transsexualism.

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Transubstantiation, transgender, transhumanism... OMFG!

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Just wait til they hear about trans parents!

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They'll see right through that.

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Oof.

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And for those with long memories, Transactional Analysis

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Rectory? Nearly killed 'em!

...

...uh, wait a minute here ...

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I'm so relieved most American conservatives don't talk like stage Irishmen, because if they did, they'd probably be a lot more popular so here's me happy that we dodged that bullet. :)

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This is absolutely true and frightening to contemplate...

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“ROSS DOUTHAT (B&B)”

Of course!

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