They should just blow up Air Force One in midair about a week before the election and say he was on it. Sure, a few people will die but that’s collateral damage and it’s not like they’ve ever cared about loss of life. And if they could figure out how to get Mitt Romney and any other marginally disloyal Senators onboard for the trip it would be a twofer.
(I'm not standing up for Kushner, who Trump would probably love to kill in a David-and-Bathsheba kind of thing. Come on, Jared's got Uriah all over him. But there's at least a pilot and probably a couple members of the flight crew --who Trump keeps calling stewardesses--who have done nothing more blameworthy than being good at their jobs and probably being hired by a slobbering pervert for having large breasts.)
I will always wonder what God utters when he gets frustrated. It's not like he can just yell "Aw, Jesus Christ!" And when he says "Goddamnit!" he really means it.
Thinking of Ivanka's stewardship role reminds me of the role Edith Bolling Wilson played for a year and a half being essentially the de facto president of the US after Woodrow Wilson's disabling stroke. Though she minimized her role, it was very clear that she was more than a mere gatekeeper though even that had policy implications by default.
That said, I get the impression that today's sketch is the first in what I assume must be a series to be continued as the Trump Maladministration continues to swirl the drain.
While I liked this, I think Stone would have gone with "Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific" as the shampoo to trap Biden, and Kellyanne and Miller should have started melting under the sprinklers, but then I am a traditionalist from South Dakota, once home to that racist newspaper editor and bazaar owner, L. Frank Baum. Baum sang in a quartet with one of the first Populist Party US Senators. I also dated a woman who used GYHST shampoo. She looked like Monica Seles
I laughed out loud. I cried. I threw up a little. And that was just from reading the cast of characters and opening stage directions. What a bunch of freaks, misfits, and lunatics. It's like something Breslin would've written about the mob. And they gather in the White House to rule us.
If Trump really wants to disappear he should let his hair revert to its natural color, stop with the cotton candy combover, and have Kellyanne's plastic surgeon knock himself out with the collagen injections. Voila! The brand new Whitey Bulger!
Donnie's hair color is what it is because it blends in so well with the baldness. You can see a great deal of scalp in some pictures where he, uh, it's fully shellacked in place.
I love Miller, halfway between the playwright in The Producers and Dr. Strangelove. And Stone, who I'm imagining being played by Dick Shawn. Brilliant stuff!
"Exit, pursued by a Bear."
(P.S. I love that you use a picture of the original "blow shit up because we want change" group in this description of Ratfuck, Inc.)
"Guido Fawkes"
They should just blow up Air Force One in midair about a week before the election and say he was on it. Sure, a few people will die but that’s collateral damage and it’s not like they’ve ever cared about loss of life. And if they could figure out how to get Mitt Romney and any other marginally disloyal Senators onboard for the trip it would be a twofer.
It worked when they wanted to get rid of Paul Wellstone...
I hate myself for upvoting this. But it was funny.
Try not to give them any ideas.
(I'm not standing up for Kushner, who Trump would probably love to kill in a David-and-Bathsheba kind of thing. Come on, Jared's got Uriah all over him. But there's at least a pilot and probably a couple members of the flight crew --who Trump keeps calling stewardesses--who have done nothing more blameworthy than being good at their jobs and probably being hired by a slobbering pervert for having large breasts.)
Jared's got urea all over him. You have an unfortunate typo there that came out "Uriah."
Yeah, I was trying for clever wordplay, but, you know, Bible jokes, it's not a gag with broad appeal.
I will always wonder what God utters when he gets frustrated. It's not like he can just yell "Aw, Jesus Christ!" And when he says "Goddamnit!" he really means it.
I thought its was heaps of fun.
Maybe that's what the Russian bounty story is all about! He was gonna do a Bob Hope in Afghanistan and then hey presto, kaboom!
No death, not going to risk a sympathy vote.
Trump's a loser. No time to go into my aging rant that he's in office because of a number of tailwinds, all of which has disappeared.
Don't be fooled by the media's lust for a real contest they can gin up. What's reported is very, very different from reality.
Roy, thanks for the added pinches of incoherence!
A tour de force! Stone with the Herbal Essence and DR zombie juice! Miller going all-in Wierdliebe! The Showtime at the Apollo astronauts!
This bit slays:
STONE: Leprosy!
TRUMP: Oooh, that’s a beaut.
I always suspected Stephen "Spawn of Hell" Miller's farts smelled of smoke. And brimstone. And Ax Body Spray...
Nothing beats "seize the armories."
"Well, Ivanka too. If she calls you about this, don’t be shocked. She may be, you know, be in charge here while I’m supposed to be dead."
That dumbass actually knows about Al Haig?
Thinking of Ivanka's stewardship role reminds me of the role Edith Bolling Wilson played for a year and a half being essentially the de facto president of the US after Woodrow Wilson's disabling stroke. Though she minimized her role, it was very clear that she was more than a mere gatekeeper though even that had policy implications by default.
That said, I get the impression that today's sketch is the first in what I assume must be a series to be continued as the Trump Maladministration continues to swirl the drain.
>The fire alarms, too, because who needs them going off when you’re just burning some papers?
This is wisdom we should all remember.
While I liked this, I think Stone would have gone with "Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific" as the shampoo to trap Biden, and Kellyanne and Miller should have started melting under the sprinklers, but then I am a traditionalist from South Dakota, once home to that racist newspaper editor and bazaar owner, L. Frank Baum. Baum sang in a quartet with one of the first Populist Party US Senators. I also dated a woman who used GYHST shampoo. She looked like Monica Seles
I laughed out loud. I cried. I threw up a little. And that was just from reading the cast of characters and opening stage directions. What a bunch of freaks, misfits, and lunatics. It's like something Breslin would've written about the mob. And they gather in the White House to rule us.
If Trump really wants to disappear he should let his hair revert to its natural color, stop with the cotton candy combover, and have Kellyanne's plastic surgeon knock himself out with the collagen injections. Voila! The brand new Whitey Bulger!
http://whywebecamehuman.com/trumps-hair/bald-picture-trump/
Speaking of Whitey, I wonder if anyone ever experimented on Trump with massive doses of LSD? That would explain a lot ....
It's not LSD or coke or booze. He's just an out of control POS. Comes naturally to him.
Donnie's hair color is what it is because it blends in so well with the baldness. You can see a great deal of scalp in some pictures where he, uh, it's fully shellacked in place.
I love Miller, halfway between the playwright in The Producers and Dr. Strangelove. And Stone, who I'm imagining being played by Dick Shawn. Brilliant stuff!
How about John 'Geets Romo' Brent, Del Close's partner on "How to Talk Hip"?
Deep cut!