48 Comments

Ripped from Today's Headlines!!!!!

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Nicely done, Lawguy...

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The headlines are going to look increasingly ripped* for awhile at least.

*as in The Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers, not as in a body-builder

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Strange how it never comes up that Trump is so obviously an amphetamine casualty. Could substitute lots of bad things for “amphetamine casualty” in that sentence. If only there were some kind of opposition party that would state the obvious, eh.

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Greenies For The Greedy

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Motherfucker's little helper

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My impulse to follow the scent of vanilla swirl wherever it leads me has now been severely impinged as I must now think twice about Dairy Queen...

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"Vanilla Swirl" is Stephen Miller's Rap Name.

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I thought he was Hummus Boy...?

And I should admit here that I was full of hummus yesterday.

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I can think of one good thing about trump. I am bound and determined to out live that asshole. Loved the part where they spit on him.

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Yeah, you'd think that the "Outlive Trump Party" would gain a lotta support pretty quickly.

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I wanna a tshirt that says that!

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Roy's missing a genuine gold mine opportunity by not setting up his own silkscreen shop – he'd make dozens!

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For some reason, the phrase "Aggrieved Substack Thousandaire" has stuck in my mind.

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Missing the comma:

Outlive Trump, Party

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If anything could get me to eat more kale, this is it.

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"Now look. I got a goddamn Nazi Hunter on my trail. No offense."

OMG this is gold!

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"Pretty sure it was hummus." :D

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Wasn't "That's not hummus" a line in a Thomas Friedman column?

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Given that it's Friedman, the hummus could have been a metaphor for anything from the Middle East peace process to the International Monetary Fund.

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New book "The Hummus And The Airbnb"

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Which is scarier, that Trump’s erratic behavior is drug induced or that’s the way his brain works on nothing but neurotransmitters and abnormal neural connections?

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Yes.

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“...stroke”: If only.

Anyway, I forget why but I was missing the formula.

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"shaking his fists in front of him like Bruno Ganz in Downfall"

I call Godwin's Law!

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People, people, people,.............

"If you're looking for something to wear to the next company barbecue (and you're not the Hawaiian shirt type) the Sailsbury [ Linen Green Suit ] is for you. Available in 4 vibrant colors and spun from durable, heavyweight linen, this suit will most certainly stand out-in all the right ways."

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I usedta shop the big flea market in town. All manner of semi useful stuff. One time somebody brought in a truckload of Hawaiian shirts. I got the very best one. Black with green&white floral accents and pink flamingos flying all over it. The flamingos were all upside down.

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Soon that suit will be in the flea market.

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It costs $500 from Indochino

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"The flamingos were all upside down."

A misprint like that airmail stamp with the upside-down airplane! It's worth MILLIONS!

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(Unless they were upside down TO HIM, while he was wearing the shirt. Shh.)

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Now you both got me confused (and concerned – where the hell did I put that shirt?!)

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I have to admit I always thought Hawaiian shirts were dumb til I saw From Here to Eternity. Any shirt's that's good enough for Montgomery Clift and Skinny Frank Sinatra is all right by me (not that it's a look I'd ever try myself, I'd probably land more towards the Fatso Judson end of the spectrum.)

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The uncool Hawaiian shirts go to bowling league.

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I generally go with Cuban shirts rather than Hawaiian

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I've got a guayabera in the closet, but I don't have the nerve to wear it, I'm no Ricardo Montalban.

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"I KNEW Ricardo Montalban. You, sir, are NO Ricardo Montalban!"

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My leather is neither rich nor Corinthian.

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This is information I won't get reading Matt Yglesias.

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Beauty. Trump under pressure when his inner goomba comes out is the best Trump of all.

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"If it wasn't for my inner goombah/I wouldn't have no inner at all..."

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His interior life is like when Melania decorated the White House for Christmas.

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Hercule Poirot...Bruno Ganz..."A CAST OF THOUSANDS. THREE YEARS IN THE MAKING!"

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"THREE YEARS IN THE MAKING, TEN TO FIFTEEN IN FEDERAL PRISON"

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Does he know who Hercule Poirot is? He doesn't read or go to that sort of movie. Probably mixed up with Ross Perot, another small guy who must walk in circles.

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His "grey cells" look like Swiss cheese by now

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That hummus hits *HARD*

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> Ms. Lake is coming

I don't want to see that. I don't want to see what provokes that, no it's not what will make her Vi' Pre'ident and then President, all with which my brain can come-up is just John Hurt as little Gaius Bootykins saying to Derek Jacobi as Claudius 'Don‘t go in there—it‘s _horrible_.'.

Speaking of Bruno Ganz, Hitler c.November 1944C.E. evidently said 'They turned me into a goddamn junkie.'; I must have got that from Norman Ohler's "Blitzed", which also has bits about Hitler's Bornstein Dr Morell trying to corner the market in Eastern European glands stuck with train-cars of rotting animal parts c.January 1945, and also great ads for Methamphetamine products, including this one for meth chocolates:

https://www.artforum.com/uploads/upload.002/id03147/article02_1064x.jpg

…here seen from this article:

https://www.artforum.com/print/201706/power-trip-drugs-and-the-pharmacology-of-control-68683

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