The return of This Is Hardcore!
After a hiatus, more email stories aimed at gramps' soft noggin
I know I recently expressed disgust with my This Is Hardcore franchise that reviews wacky rightwing email stories, saying it was just too toxic to spend even a few minutes a week with these people (the emailers because they’re scum, the emailees because they’re pathetic victims of dementia and Fox News). But I sorta owe it to Clio The Muse of History; heaven has blessed me with this, and this with me, that I must be their scourge and minister.
American Wire, “Laura Ingraham's Story Ends in Tragedy”
Look at that header image. I can’t share the Melania news the liberal media refuses to cover because the button leads to an email harvesting scam by something called Revv LLC (for which I happily signed up; for research purposes, the scamosphere must believe I’m a senile rageoholic Fox viewer. It’s a small enough sacrifice for my beloved Republic!). But even scammier is what the Laura Ingraham headline turns to once you click through. When I saw the original come-on I was at least hoping something bad had actually happened to this miserable Nazi witch, but the link leads to a headline that downgraded my expectations:
Oooh, controversy — like when she has white supremacists on the show? No:
(ET, Thursday, July 11, 2019) - She said she was ending the radio show to spend more time on the daily podcast—but Fox New’s golden host may actually have bigger things in mind.
Laura Ingraham, one of the most listened to women on political talk radio in the country has shocked us all walking away from her television career. In recent developments, the radio host revealed that she would be putting more time into her beauty business now that it’s grown so fast.
You may have seen this before — sometimes it’s a health scam featuring someone like Stephen Hawking, but sometimes it’s a beauty product scam not only claiming a famous person as an avatar but also claiming other celebrities as endorsers with quotes — for example, in this case, Rosie Perez (“The advances Laura has made in the anti-aging skincare industry are remarkable. I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t had the chance to try it out for myself...”). If you think Rosie Perez is actually caping for Laura Ingraham, well, maybe you’re the kind of senile septuagenarian these scumbags are fishing for.
This venue is new to me, but seems to follow the usual pattern of slander and innuendo — but extra points for the lengthy, oddly-specific headline! The article, attributed to “Myron Cohen” (a tribute that doubles as an expression of contempt for the readers), just regurgitates the news that the mouthy lesbian soccer star preemptively rebuffed Trump and accepted an invite to visit Congress, with which you can make Gramps mad by reminding him it’s the House of the People.
Speaking of long, misleading headlines:
Liberty One, “Ocasio-Cortez Openly Commits Another Brazen, Anti-America Felony, But Will She Be Held Accountable?”
The “felony" is not identified, but implied to be AOC disseminating legal information that reminds immigrants of their rights in the event of a raid. Gramps may be disappointed she didn't stick up a bank, but at least he's found this nice Jewish fella Cohen who he can incorporate into his racist gang rape fantasies.
Ugh, one more:
Independent Minute, “Ilhan Omar Went Too Far, Dems Take First Step To Remove Her From Congress, Discussions Begin About Primary Challenge.”
Uh huh.
IT SEEMS THAT MINNESOTA DEMOCRATS HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF REPRESENTATIVE ILHAN OMAR’S ANTI-SEMITIC COMMENTS AND ARE NOW REPORTEDLY CONSIDERING REMOVING HER FROM CONGRESS VIA A PRIMARY CHALLENGE AGAINST HER IN THE 2020 ELECTIONS.
The primary source is the once-respectable The Hill, which attributes this sentiment to “several party leaders” but can only get supporting quotes from “executive director of the Jewish Community Relations Council of Minnesota and the Dakotas,” who is not a party leader, and one Dem state senator who merely confirms “There’s definitely talk”; The Hill also claims “some Democrats are eyeing Bobby Joe Champion,” but quotes neither Champion nor anyone who’s eyeing him. That’s okay, Gramps ain’t looking for evidence but affirmation. What I want to know is, what distinguishes The Hill from Independent Minute or any of these other guys, besides a marginal effort to make it look good?
"Ben Shapiro DESTROYS carnie who tells him he is too short to ride the ride."
The Hill used to be a decent publication. Josh Marshall of TPM worked there long ago. But since Trump oozed into the Oval Offal, The Hill has become just one more cheerleader for Dear Leader, happily spreading mis- and mal-information and doing whatever it can to undermine its own existence.
As for Laura Ingraham's beauty secrets, I want to know more. Like, did she develop them while doing the horizontal bop with D'inesh D'ivorsa? Do the products involve unguents made from the essence of her enemies? Does she put the lotion on her skin before she gets the hose again?