Sounds like she’s another graduate of the Kari Lake School Of GOP Grifters, and that particular academy teaches only two lessons: You can’t be defeated if you never acknowledge the fact you lost, and there’s more money to be made by claiming to be the trampled victim of the Left than there is in actually winning an election and drawing a government paycheck.
In keeping with their sexism, the GOP Congress only allows one psychopathic woman at a time to make a big splash -- ask Lauren Boebert, who keeps trying and failing to steal some of MTG's thunder. So Flores will have a higher profile doing what she's doing than trying to get some elbow room in Congress.
Good point. Has anyone seen Santos and Mayra Flores in the same room at the same time? I'm suspicious she could merely be another one of George's grifting alter egos.
It works for Kristi Noem too. She barely pretends she’s governor. She just puts on her makeup and her Rodeo Barbie outfit, then goes on Fox to drawl and pout and watch the money roll in.
I know, I know...I hate that I have to walk 2 or even 3 blocks to get all the groceries I need, and all the deli delights, and the library books, and the gourmet baked goods, and cash from the bank, and recharged CO2 canisters, and a haircut (PRO TIP – when I get a haircut I get 'em ALL cut) and artwork framed, and mondo glorioso vegan Thai goodies, and rooftop dining overlooking the city, and the Metro station or the bus, and the latest movies (well, they claim they're gonna reopen soon)...
Note that I left out the short bike ride to a dozen free museums, free concerts every night...oh, and the zoo is NEXT DOOR. And when I'm tired of THAT zoo, I can always ride down to the MAGAs on Parade.
Just to be all both-sidesy about this (hoping for a high-paying gig at the WaPo out of this) it's a pretty well-known meal ticket to pick a Republican liberals especially hate and run against them even though you have approximately zero chance of winning. Hoo boy, does the money roll in, and who's to say whether you actually spent it all when it's all over, right?
Not to say Amy McGrath shouldn't have run against Mitch McConnell, or that guy Marcus* shouldn't have run against MTG, I just wish liberals were a little smarter about where they send their money.
Which reminds me, what is Beto O'Rourke up to these days? Not saying he necessarily had zero chance of winning, but I think most of us were drinking the Texas-Is-Ready-To-Turn-Blue Kool-Aid for a few years there.
Yeah, the problem here is if you send me an email saying "I'm running against Ted Cruz" then all of my ability to do cost-benefit analysis goes out the fucking window, I hate Ted Cruz that much. Meanwhile, there was a race in the 3rd Congressional district that the Dems could have actually won, but the Republican wasn't Ted Cruz so I forgot to give any money, dammit.
As someone who’s always passively on the lookout for a really smashing epitaph, “I was attacked by a pervert” really grabbed me. If you know what I mean.
Aww. This made me remember a man named Nathan Mathis. Back in 2017 he came out against voting for Roy Moore for the Alabama senate. His reason? Roy Moore was a mean homophobe whose thinking Mathis had once shared - until his beloved gay daughter Patti died by suicide at the age of 23.
Throughout his initial recorded protest, he railed at anyone who could think of Patti as some sort of PREvert. He was hurt, angry, remorseful, and grieving. He got a lot of support from Evil Libtards and eventually began saying PERvert instead. I just found it so touching that he made his sign and got out and protested at a Moore campaign event, all on his own, with just what he knew at the time, because he missed his daughter.
[pushes glasses up on nose] Yeah, math checks out, each time she runs she reduces the distance between winning and losing by half. Which means she'll be elected in... lessee... never, which I hear is going to be a big year for Republicans.
I need to make some money producing a Latino themed challenge coin. Still working on the details, but there will be a crazy Q side and a grift side with a URL straight to me! I'll call them "Lunaticas!" Bingo $$$$$! I have been told by several people I trust that the Spanish language sites seem even worse than the English, so time to cash in!
Tammy Duckworth was on MSNBC saying THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE was to hold an individual vote on each of the 600 appointments, to which I say, fine, cancel the August recess and do a 24-hour-a-day vote-a-rama til its done. After all, you're the ones telling us the defense of the nation is at stake.
Hate to play armchair quarterback here (who am I kidding, I live for this stuff) but why can't you write a single bill that just says "These 600 people are hereby appointed to these 600 positions"? Oh, I know, something something Senate Parliamentarian (and none of this should be read as diminishing the fact that Mr. TuberHead is a bigoted asshole, as are all Senate Republicans.)
How dare you float ideas or ask our elected officials to use their power more creatively! That’s Green Lanternism! Besides, it’s not like the republic is at stake. That’s only true near Election Day. /s
Cynic that I am, I suspect Schumer and the Senate Dems think they're being clever here, military voters are a key constituency that normally leans Republican, having Flaming Asshole Tuber out there in public every day saying "Fuck You" to the military might be of marginal help in the 2024 elections, why not let the show run as long as possible? Of course, that somewhat conflicts with their claim that this must be resolved immediately because the safety of the nation is at risk.
The complete and utter lack of urgency in the Senate is maddening. The ossified American House of Lords is still playing by the 1970s era rules, and their glacial pace has degenerated into total inertia. But they move quickly when a recess is called for vacation!
“This reminds me of the year I taught at Stanford… or was it when the Oberlin faculty told me I was so overqualified I didn’t need to apply? At any rate, it proves that everyone to my political left is a foolish child.”
Speaking of grifters, I saw last night that Ammon Bundy lost in the courts and will be liable for millions. 🤣
I also heard things are not going well for the Grenons, the assholes who popularized bleach drinking by forging a fake church around it and whining about "religious freedom".
The first Duc du Grenon was Louis XIV's Tenth Holder of the Close-Stool until one day he dropped it and was unceremoniously retired to the provinces. The third Duc du Grenon was guillotined during the Terror and had his lands confiscated.
Please don't dis the Texas Tribune! It's where I go for news about the Austin monsters Abbott, Patrick, and Paxton. Great coverage of Patrick's latest obscenity (getting a university professor suspended in a single afternoon after she supposedly criticized him in a lecture in Galveston https://www.texastribune.org/2023/07/25/texas-a-m-professor-opioids-dan-patrick/)
Jesus. I'm not saying we've reached the point where a Governor can say "Give me a list of professors for the interment camps", but I am saying that if we ever reach that point, we can be sure that there will be no shortage of university administrators happy to do the job.
Republicans love throwing out the word "Orwellian" to describe anything even remotely woke, government-sponsored or not, but getting a teacher suspended because she uttered a criticism of Patrick (as yet I haven't discovered what she actually said, but based on her sterling resume, I doubt it was anything coarse, like "Can you believe what that asshole Dan Patrick did?") is pretty damn Orwellian, not to mention all cancel-culturey. They really want all their state schools to be staffed by yes-men and -women, utterly fearful of losing thwir jobs should they make a wrongthink comment.
Actually in this case it was something more like "Lieutenant Governor blocking legalization of fentanyl test strips is going to kill people", so you can see why he might take offense, but it's also true. The most Orwellian part is that there was a kid in the class who served as an informant and reported it to her GOP hotshot mother and among all the GOP hotshots working the phones they got the professor suspended in two-three hours. I wrote it up a little bit at the old Blogspot https://yastreblyansky.blogspot.com/2023/07/but-tell-us-about-that-terrible-leftist.html
Sounds like she’s another graduate of the Kari Lake School Of GOP Grifters, and that particular academy teaches only two lessons: You can’t be defeated if you never acknowledge the fact you lost, and there’s more money to be made by claiming to be the trampled victim of the Left than there is in actually winning an election and drawing a government paycheck.
Who even wants the hassle of being in DC when you can just earn some cash making media appearances and sending rage emails?
In keeping with their sexism, the GOP Congress only allows one psychopathic woman at a time to make a big splash -- ask Lauren Boebert, who keeps trying and failing to steal some of MTG's thunder. So Flores will have a higher profile doing what she's doing than trying to get some elbow room in Congress.
[George Santos*, lurking in the corner of the deepest darkest office in the Longworth building, snickers]: "Amateur!"
*or whatever he calls himself now)
Good point. Has anyone seen Santos and Mayra Flores in the same room at the same time? I'm suspicious she could merely be another one of George's grifting alter egos.
No. Would be weirder if anyone actually WAS looking...
Soon to be Georgi Santoski when he flees to Belarus to avoid prison.
Which. now that I think of it (and I'll freely admit I shouldn't) sounds SUSPICIOUSLY close to "Jerry Sandusky."
It works for Kristi Noem too. She barely pretends she’s governor. She just puts on her makeup and her Rodeo Barbie outfit, then goes on Fox to drawl and pout and watch the money roll in.
I know, I know...I hate that I have to walk 2 or even 3 blocks to get all the groceries I need, and all the deli delights, and the library books, and the gourmet baked goods, and cash from the bank, and recharged CO2 canisters, and a haircut (PRO TIP – when I get a haircut I get 'em ALL cut) and artwork framed, and mondo glorioso vegan Thai goodies, and rooftop dining overlooking the city, and the Metro station or the bus, and the latest movies (well, they claim they're gonna reopen soon)...
#trythatinasmalltown
You have to admit, you set me up for that one.
We're slingin' the hash now!
Note that I left out the short bike ride to a dozen free museums, free concerts every night...oh, and the zoo is NEXT DOOR. And when I'm tired of THAT zoo, I can always ride down to the MAGAs on Parade.
mondo glorioso vegan Thai goodies
Do you make your wife say mondo glorioso vegan Thigh goodies?
Sir! I will have you know that I know better than to see my entrails dangling by a thread!
The party that decries "participation trophies" is also the party that shrieks "I'm the winner in my mind."
Just to be all both-sidesy about this (hoping for a high-paying gig at the WaPo out of this) it's a pretty well-known meal ticket to pick a Republican liberals especially hate and run against them even though you have approximately zero chance of winning. Hoo boy, does the money roll in, and who's to say whether you actually spent it all when it's all over, right?
Not to say Amy McGrath shouldn't have run against Mitch McConnell, or that guy Marcus* shouldn't have run against MTG, I just wish liberals were a little smarter about where they send their money.
*Dude is STILL emailing me.
Which reminds me, what is Beto O'Rourke up to these days? Not saying he necessarily had zero chance of winning, but I think most of us were drinking the Texas-Is-Ready-To-Turn-Blue Kool-Aid for a few years there.
Yeah, the problem here is if you send me an email saying "I'm running against Ted Cruz" then all of my ability to do cost-benefit analysis goes out the fucking window, I hate Ted Cruz that much. Meanwhile, there was a race in the 3rd Congressional district that the Dems could have actually won, but the Republican wasn't Ted Cruz so I forgot to give any money, dammit.
So it's your fault. Way to go SteveB
“I was attacked by a pervert” sounds like a line I would have heard in an 80s comedy. Maybe a deleted scene from Ghostbusters.
"How do you know he's a pervert?"
"Because I'm one and I've seen him at the meetings!"
As someone who’s always passively on the lookout for a really smashing epitaph, “I was attacked by a pervert” really grabbed me. If you know what I mean.
No match for "Weasels ripped my flesh."
Rizzzz!
The classic is on a grave marker in Key West: “I Told You I Was Sick”
Some people always have to have the last word.
""The Biggest pervert you ever saw!" Mancuso spread his arms like he was describing a fish."-A Confederacy of Dunces
If the Republicans want someone who really was attacked by a pervert, they should nominate E. Jean Carroll.
Touché!
1 oof. 2 marks.
For some reason I keep reading it as “PREvert.” Must be too much residual Hee Haw in my bloodstream.
Tangent alert!
Aww. This made me remember a man named Nathan Mathis. Back in 2017 he came out against voting for Roy Moore for the Alabama senate. His reason? Roy Moore was a mean homophobe whose thinking Mathis had once shared - until his beloved gay daughter Patti died by suicide at the age of 23.
Throughout his initial recorded protest, he railed at anyone who could think of Patti as some sort of PREvert. He was hurt, angry, remorseful, and grieving. He got a lot of support from Evil Libtards and eventually began saying PERvert instead. I just found it so touching that he made his sign and got out and protested at a Moore campaign event, all on his own, with just what he knew at the time, because he missed his daughter.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ud9zBKJJQe4
The more times you fail at something the more liable you are to be successful. All you have to do is fail enough times. That's just math.
Steve?
Steve?
(Dammit. Where's that dude when we need 'im?)
[pushes glasses up on nose] Yeah, math checks out, each time she runs she reduces the distance between winning and losing by half. Which means she'll be elected in... lessee... never, which I hear is going to be a big year for Republicans.
Even if she uses calculus?
I would say there's VERY little risk of that. Infinitesimals are the work of Satan, you know.
Hearted for the glasses – that's so cute!
She has discovered Zeno's Paradox
and a book by Megan McArdle
"ixnay on the anon-Qay"
was not on my bingo card today...sigh...
But what I wanna know is, with all the shit sloshing around this here nation already, why does anyone think it's a good idea to make up more?
If you just Venmo me $24, I'll provide you with my "Make Up Shit" kit that shows how YOU can make up shit and profit from it!
Oo, Oo – I NEED this!
Now that I'm Q (cf yesterday's comments) I really need to up/down/sideways my game!
Any time you need encouragement, just drop me a note and I will happily yell "Up yours!" to help you along.
I'm feeling edgier already!
I need to make some money producing a Latino themed challenge coin. Still working on the details, but there will be a crazy Q side and a grift side with a URL straight to me! I'll call them "Lunaticas!" Bingo $$$$$! I have been told by several people I trust that the Spanish language sites seem even worse than the English, so time to cash in!
"Mano a Mano!"
Know what I'm dice´in'?
Il Lunatico si protecte!
The American dream includes expanding the umbrella of whiteness, one ethnic group at a time. (Offer void for incomes below average.)
(The Umbrella of Whiteness *does* need a steady supply of cannon fodder.)
The Bumbershoot of Gun Fondlers
Yep, and Hispanic CPB agents and their families are first in line.
Hispanic CBD agents, on the other hand...
If we didn't exist they would have to make us up.
I think they have, even though we're standing right here.
Tell me where, in which country
Is Flores, The Virtuous Latina MAGAt,
Her spirtiual first cousin;
Echo Loomer, repeating QAnon noise
Over internet and vid,
Who had a beauty hardly human?
Oh, where are the snowjobs of yesteryear!
Where is the very wise Sarah H.
For whom for whom tRump's lies
were the golden gate
to her father's former place
And made her benighted state
Un woke and sleeping in hate:
Oh, here live the snowjobs of yesteryear!
The queen Melania ('the Dark one")white
as SS Ilsa with basilisk glare
Marge of the Big Foot, Bobert of the guns;
Senile Susan who from Maine,
And Krazy KKKarens from each state
Bad women burning with tRumpian hate..
Where are they, oh sovereign Virgin?
Oh, Here are the snowjobs of yesteryear!
Gentles, do not ask me in the whole week
Where they are -for they are here,
Lest I bring you back to this refrain:
Oh, today we still see the grifters of yesteryear!
-With apologies to F. Villon
All great though I especially like "SS Ilsa with basilisk glare/Marge of the Big Foot..."
I now wish I'd used
"and vaseline smeared Kari Lake
who won't give up (for goodness sake..)
Hot! This sounds a bit like Paradise Lost Book I, giving the catalogue of angels fallen with Lucifer.
Now do the style of Christopher Smart!
For I will consider my MAGA loon Lauren
For she is the servant of Q
For she maintains glorious lunacy in the House
For she counteracts the democrats by yelling Groomer
For she shouts Pervert thrice before the cameras
For there is nothing more marvelous than her crazy eyes
For there is nothing more joyous than the static between her ears
For she can creep
That's eight "For"s, which I think is 32.
[adjusts tinfoil hat]
[crinkle]
I just realized I used Lauren Bobert instead of whoever we were discussing. Oh well; just roll with it.
It's improv, the correct answer is always "Yes, and..."
Loomer of the Uncanny Valley
"Same thing, only harder" leads to a rather exorbitant lubricant bill...
Even if you're not Mrs. Ben Shapiro.
We laugh, but Republicans have been trying to peel off Hispanic voters with misinformation: https://www.miaminewtimes.com/news/latino-groups-condemn-disinformation-in-miamis-spanish-media-11804362
(Somewhat related: why the Texas National Guard hasn't been federalized yet to remove Abbott's Floating Fence I have no idea.)
"why the Texas National Guard hasn't been federalized yet to remove Abbott's Floating Fence I have no idea..."
Maybe the same reason Tommy Tuberville, all on his lonesome, is able to block more than 600 military promotions in the Senate?
Democrats: "It's just... we can't..."
Wouldn't want to be seen as DIVISIVE, after all. Might piss off the independent voters!
Tammy Duckworth was on MSNBC saying THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE was to hold an individual vote on each of the 600 appointments, to which I say, fine, cancel the August recess and do a 24-hour-a-day vote-a-rama til its done. After all, you're the ones telling us the defense of the nation is at stake.
Hate to play armchair quarterback here (who am I kidding, I live for this stuff) but why can't you write a single bill that just says "These 600 people are hereby appointed to these 600 positions"? Oh, I know, something something Senate Parliamentarian (and none of this should be read as diminishing the fact that Mr. TuberHead is a bigoted asshole, as are all Senate Republicans.)
How dare you float ideas or ask our elected officials to use their power more creatively! That’s Green Lanternism! Besides, it’s not like the republic is at stake. That’s only true near Election Day. /s
Cynic that I am, I suspect Schumer and the Senate Dems think they're being clever here, military voters are a key constituency that normally leans Republican, having Flaming Asshole Tuber out there in public every day saying "Fuck You" to the military might be of marginal help in the 2024 elections, why not let the show run as long as possible? Of course, that somewhat conflicts with their claim that this must be resolved immediately because the safety of the nation is at risk.
Also, all the ideas I float sink.
The complete and utter lack of urgency in the Senate is maddening. The ossified American House of Lords is still playing by the 1970s era rules, and their glacial pace has degenerated into total inertia. But they move quickly when a recess is called for vacation!
I see someone has been reading LGM
“This reminds me of the year I taught at Stanford… or was it when the Oberlin faculty told me I was so overqualified I didn’t need to apply? At any rate, it proves that everyone to my political left is a foolish child.”
I love me a good “Ubi Sunt,” so I enjoy your use of Yesteryear, Roy. Aces.
You ubi sunt! U brought her!
But Mayra, WHY did you had to concede your race, huh?
Speaking of grifters, I saw last night that Ammon Bundy lost in the courts and will be liable for millions. 🤣
I also heard things are not going well for the Grenons, the assholes who popularized bleach drinking by forging a fake church around it and whining about "religious freedom".
"the Grenons" sound like something out of a Twilight Zone episode.
Or Star Trek. "As you know, Captain, the Grenons have held this area of space for the last 250 years"
You REALLY don't want to be subject to the Grenon mind-meld.
The first Duc du Grenon was Louis XIV's Tenth Holder of the Close-Stool until one day he dropped it and was unceremoniously retired to the provinces. The third Duc du Grenon was guillotined during the Terror and had his lands confiscated.
Yeah, having those lands confiscated musta hurt...
One suspects Americano Media didn't translate "Fake News" is because it's not totally intended for a Spanish-speaking audience, if you get my meaning.
The whole thing is probably written in the kind of fake Spanish used by American tourists in Cancun: "Yo wanto una cerveza por favor."
Please don't dis the Texas Tribune! It's where I go for news about the Austin monsters Abbott, Patrick, and Paxton. Great coverage of Patrick's latest obscenity (getting a university professor suspended in a single afternoon after she supposedly criticized him in a lecture in Galveston https://www.texastribune.org/2023/07/25/texas-a-m-professor-opioids-dan-patrick/)
Well shut my mouth. Since they were so Flores-friendly I figured they hadda be bullshit! Guess they were just dazzled by her winning personality.
Jesus. I'm not saying we've reached the point where a Governor can say "Give me a list of professors for the interment camps", but I am saying that if we ever reach that point, we can be sure that there will be no shortage of university administrators happy to do the job.
And evidently students eager to turn the profs in to the administrators.
Republicans love throwing out the word "Orwellian" to describe anything even remotely woke, government-sponsored or not, but getting a teacher suspended because she uttered a criticism of Patrick (as yet I haven't discovered what she actually said, but based on her sterling resume, I doubt it was anything coarse, like "Can you believe what that asshole Dan Patrick did?") is pretty damn Orwellian, not to mention all cancel-culturey. They really want all their state schools to be staffed by yes-men and -women, utterly fearful of losing thwir jobs should they make a wrongthink comment.
Actually in this case it was something more like "Lieutenant Governor blocking legalization of fentanyl test strips is going to kill people", so you can see why he might take offense, but it's also true. The most Orwellian part is that there was a kid in the class who served as an informant and reported it to her GOP hotshot mother and among all the GOP hotshots working the phones they got the professor suspended in two-three hours. I wrote it up a little bit at the old Blogspot https://yastreblyansky.blogspot.com/2023/07/but-tell-us-about-that-terrible-leftist.html
Oilwellian!
Insert wildly inventive limerick here.
Or just slink away muttering "I'mo run outta marks!"