Brilliant. I'm starting to feel like Eeyore here, but I feel compelled to point out that McLean is an abuser of women, so his (past?) affinity for the gun cult is not surprising. Domestic violence and gun violence go together like soup and sandwich.
Good for Don, pulling himself back from the Ted Nugent septic pit his career has taken him to. Don was an asshole in high school - a talented asshole but an asshole none the less - and apparently stayed that way. It doesn’t help that I hated Bye Bye American Pie the first time I heard it and it has followed me around my whole life, like a rabid raccoon. Roy’s parody is the only good thing about that song I’ve ever encountered, but it brought that god-awful tune back into my head. Please, bring back Lothar and the Hand People if you want to resurrect the local music of my youth (at least Waddy Wachtel still gets work with Keith).
May 27, 2022·edited May 27, 2022Liked by Roy Edroso
Nice! Not "nice" nice, But well done.
Ohio is one of those constitutional carry states now which means any asshole can get a gun and carry it around, concealed. . And the assholes seem to have gone for it in a big way.
The lead story on the local news is about the shooting at a Walmart north of Cincinnati . Some guy was shoplifting, store employees intervened and, as was evidently his right, the suspected shoplifter pulled out his gun and shot two people. One was the greeter. You think the Greeter got a big bump in his pension for his family since he was shot "In the Line of Duty"? Ha Ha fuck me no! Not like he's a cop who got Covid for refusing to wear a mask or get a shot and died or something.
Of the other 8 stories on news, 4 more involved shootings. It's becoming epidemic and pretty soon everybody's going to notice. I wonder what happens then? We've shit the bed so hard about this, I don't think we can unshit it.
First time I kissed a girl "American Pie" was playing on the radio. I am fond of that song.
Roy is old enough to remember that not long before American Pie came out, America was in the middle of an epidemic of gun violence that involved a specific type of firearm--the Saturday night special. These were cheap handguns; small revolvers that were mass produced and flooded the streets. Lyndon Johnson pushed for, and got, legislation banning the manufacture and sale of Saturday night specials.
That was then, this is now. A Saturday night special could kill two or maybe three people if the shooter was really lucky, while a modern assault rifle can kill dozens. We banned one because the death toll was unacceptable; we're now told that no amount of death is reason enough to ban the other. I'm sure it's no small coincidence that Saturday night specials were flooding ghettoes (and thus a weapon "those people" could easily access), which made them easy to outlaw. Just as I'm sure it's no coincidence at all that assault rifles are the death-toys of choice for White men, and thus cannot be outlawed or even meaningfully regulated.
Gotta unlock it so I can tweet and spread the brilliance.
Or maybe I’m an old who remembers the song.
Also need to add that we’re one following the tabloid media, one would know McLean is exactly the kind of person whom you shouldn’t be surprise seeing entertaining the NRA.
Roy, it’s such a pleasure to read a piece like this where the rhyme works and the meter scans, and the words are chosen for meaning, not just to fit. Kudos.
I can't credit the douchebag's decision much -- why did he agree to perform in the first place? "Oh! The R stands for 'Rifle'!??? No, no, no... that won't do at all!"
My apologies to all boomers -- "American Pie" is absolute garbage. My solace is that no good karaoke DJ will allow singers to do it.
Following on the notions of 'one a week', 'epidemic', etc. Yesterday we heard that the Texas unpleasantness was the 27th(!) mass casualty incident in a school so far this year. That's roughly one mass shooting in a school EVERY 4TH SCHOOL DAY.
I got more to say about people and their things, but too scattered to write yet.
Finalement, the poetry strikes me in a way maybe none of you would recognize, but only because I have a poetic friend whose word choices, rhythms and tone all are similar to this from Roy. Almost eerie to me. Anyway, I'll forward to my friend and let them ponder it themselves...
Full disclosure: I never minded American Pie. Yes, it was sort of Bob-Dylan-for-Kids, but it wasn't overtly stupid (high praise indeed) and had that Sunshine/Stuck in the Middle With You groove. I was shocked to see McClean advertised for the NRA performance, though. Roy's take, vis a vis McClean's career maintenance, is just cynical enough to be exactly right.
Brilliant. I'm starting to feel like Eeyore here, but I feel compelled to point out that McLean is an abuser of women, so his (past?) affinity for the gun cult is not surprising. Domestic violence and gun violence go together like soup and sandwich.
Roy, make this column public. Also, call upon your punk rock past and make an actual song out of it. Post it here or on YouTube or wherever.
Good for Don, pulling himself back from the Ted Nugent septic pit his career has taken him to. Don was an asshole in high school - a talented asshole but an asshole none the less - and apparently stayed that way. It doesn’t help that I hated Bye Bye American Pie the first time I heard it and it has followed me around my whole life, like a rabid raccoon. Roy’s parody is the only good thing about that song I’ve ever encountered, but it brought that god-awful tune back into my head. Please, bring back Lothar and the Hand People if you want to resurrect the local music of my youth (at least Waddy Wachtel still gets work with Keith).
Nice! Not "nice" nice, But well done.
Ohio is one of those constitutional carry states now which means any asshole can get a gun and carry it around, concealed. . And the assholes seem to have gone for it in a big way.
The lead story on the local news is about the shooting at a Walmart north of Cincinnati . Some guy was shoplifting, store employees intervened and, as was evidently his right, the suspected shoplifter pulled out his gun and shot two people. One was the greeter. You think the Greeter got a big bump in his pension for his family since he was shot "In the Line of Duty"? Ha Ha fuck me no! Not like he's a cop who got Covid for refusing to wear a mask or get a shot and died or something.
Of the other 8 stories on news, 4 more involved shootings. It's becoming epidemic and pretty soon everybody's going to notice. I wonder what happens then? We've shit the bed so hard about this, I don't think we can unshit it.
First time I kissed a girl "American Pie" was playing on the radio. I am fond of that song.
Roy is old enough to remember that not long before American Pie came out, America was in the middle of an epidemic of gun violence that involved a specific type of firearm--the Saturday night special. These were cheap handguns; small revolvers that were mass produced and flooded the streets. Lyndon Johnson pushed for, and got, legislation banning the manufacture and sale of Saturday night specials.
That was then, this is now. A Saturday night special could kill two or maybe three people if the shooter was really lucky, while a modern assault rifle can kill dozens. We banned one because the death toll was unacceptable; we're now told that no amount of death is reason enough to ban the other. I'm sure it's no small coincidence that Saturday night specials were flooding ghettoes (and thus a weapon "those people" could easily access), which made them easy to outlaw. Just as I'm sure it's no coincidence at all that assault rifles are the death-toys of choice for White men, and thus cannot be outlawed or even meaningfully regulated.
My breath is taken by this brilliance.
Gotta unlock it so I can tweet and spread the brilliance.
Or maybe I’m an old who remembers the song.
Also need to add that we’re one following the tabloid media, one would know McLean is exactly the kind of person whom you shouldn’t be surprise seeing entertaining the NRA.
Huzzah!
Roy, it’s such a pleasure to read a piece like this where the rhyme works and the meter scans, and the words are chosen for meaning, not just to fit. Kudos.
I can't credit the douchebag's decision much -- why did he agree to perform in the first place? "Oh! The R stands for 'Rifle'!??? No, no, no... that won't do at all!"
My apologies to all boomers -- "American Pie" is absolute garbage. My solace is that no good karaoke DJ will allow singers to do it.
Brilliant.
Fabulously, exquisitely swell. Molto bravo muchississimo.
Following on the notions of 'one a week', 'epidemic', etc. Yesterday we heard that the Texas unpleasantness was the 27th(!) mass casualty incident in a school so far this year. That's roughly one mass shooting in a school EVERY 4TH SCHOOL DAY.
I got more to say about people and their things, but too scattered to write yet.
Finalement, the poetry strikes me in a way maybe none of you would recognize, but only because I have a poetic friend whose word choices, rhythms and tone all are similar to this from Roy. Almost eerie to me. Anyway, I'll forward to my friend and let them ponder it themselves...
Fantastic, Roy. I have no notes!
Full disclosure: I never minded American Pie. Yes, it was sort of Bob-Dylan-for-Kids, but it wasn't overtly stupid (high praise indeed) and had that Sunshine/Stuck in the Middle With You groove. I was shocked to see McClean advertised for the NRA performance, though. Roy's take, vis a vis McClean's career maintenance, is just cynical enough to be exactly right.
’Cause the people just have a vote —
NRA bought Joe Manchin a boat!
Oh, that's gonna stick with me.