Why would Joe Biden do this?

Another free and frank exchange of ideas on Received Opinion

Hello, I’m Bolt Upright and this is Received Opinion. If, like me, you’re a pundit who’s managed to keep your job under no fewer than three changes of management, you’ll be shocked — or, as we pundits like to say, gobsmacked at the head-spinning news — that no sooner had Joe Biden gaffe-ingly called Trump Republican “semi-fascists,” the President doubled down, giving an entire speech accusing these same Republicans of representing, quote, “an extremism that threatens the very foundations of our republic,” and other highly partisan attacks, accusations, and assassinations of character. Joining us to discuss the President’s extremely un-bipartisan display are three Republicans: Smoot Hawley, the under-assistant west coast promotion man for the Republican National Committee, Congressional candidate Marcy Patty Joni, and Mr. Bud Jones, winner of Received Opinion’s new Vox Populi drawing that brings you the viewer, or one of you the viewer, onto the show to be our voice of the people. Mr. Jones is manager of Distinction Prius in Sandy Point, North Carolina, and he has chosen an interesting outfit to appear on our show, which we will ask him about soon. But first, Mr. Hawley: The consensus so far is that President Biden has overstepped, is partisan, and has further divided an already divided nation. Do you agree?

HAWLEY: You have literally taken the words out of my mouth, Bolt. Except for that last bit, though, because our polls show that America is united against Joe Biden and his Democrat Party and that Joe Biden’s terrible speech has just made Americans even more united against him.

UPRIGHT: Well, Mr. Hawley, I literally hate to contradict you but the latest polls actually show the Democrats gaining in the midterms.

HAWLEY: Sputter, sputter, if I knew I was going to be ambushed by a card-carrying member of the effete liberal media I would never have come on this communist program, you pedophile child molesting pedophile pedophi-ler.