26 Comments

"Rudy Giuliani holds..." his dick* in his hand? (*Could have been his toobin, not sure.)

"...Trump tells the crowd he will pay cash bribes...". Were this IRL, the $$ would be due to be received after the election and Donnie would either welch on paying out or be paying out with suckers and losers' money instead of his. (Latter is sort of how Trump Pence 2020 went near broke.)

"...a ragtag band of American militiamen, QAnon adherents, and Latin Mass cultists, calling themselves the 'JFK Jr. Brigade'... Ooohh, I love this, specially the JFK Jr. Brigade.

Loved this piece.

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I hear the next GOP oppo dump orchestrated by Rudy includes copies of hand-written lullabies Joe Biden would sing to his young sons after their mother died. Could be a game changer.

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I think I'm in love with you.

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I've always wanted a plastic halberd.

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(Plastic Halberd opened for Metallica at Lollapalooza 2020 if I remember correctly)

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Would you settle for a Bakelite glaive-guisarme?

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Thank you, Borat!

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I got to say, and I know I only saw the very little bit around TT's "speech", (learned from the least y'know) but that the music playing at that "Trump Pride" thing was obviously DJ'd by someone who has never actually attended a real Pride event.

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Obligatory Zardoz: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwZhKGgmoUI

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They’re not social distancing, but at least most of ’em are wearing masks.

(It takes a special kind of genius to make a film as transcendentally, gloriously silly as 𝘡𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘰𝘻. Don’t get me wrong: I love the flick. But John Boorman had to have reached deep inside his soul—or somewhere—to pull this one out, although Ken Russell used to be able to do this sort of thing in his sleep. Oh, and Sean Connery? Those anguished looks he throws at the camera every now and then suggest that his contact must have included some dire non-completion clauses.)

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Obligatory Zardoz like

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I shudder to think what Rudy will actually end up being caught out on after Trump leaves office. The guy leaves a slime trail wherever he goes, and I'm sure he's also completely enmeshed with the Russian mob and Russian intelligence. I would probably chortle myself to death if America's Mayor ended up being tried for treason.

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Almost as unbelievable as the DNI kissing Trump’s ass while admitting Russia (and Iran, wtf?) is threatening Democratic voters - oops, he forgot that part, just did the Trump ass-kissing, followed by Trump threatening to fire the FBI director.

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It's not parody anymore - it's prophecy.

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There has to be more last-minute movie tie-ins out there, right? Giuliani can't be the only one. Jason Miller in F&F15, where he plays a bad guy shot early for stealing a cocaine shipment. Stephen Miller plays Hans Landa in a community theatre production of Inglorious Basterds. The campaign inserts Trump into an old Bob Hope special, plus they fake an appearance in a bunch of old Love Boat episodes.

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'latin mass cultists'--thanks, and thanks to Francis who is now well to the left of Dreher, Barr, et al

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I've got hay fever at the mo', nasal passages are swollen and closed and so when I laughed my arse off it almost turned into an auto-erotic event.

And, really, you wouldn't think the media could be so accurately portrayed by “HUNTER F*CKED ME SEZ CRIPPLED ORPHAN.” aaaahahahahahaha.

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Bravo all around. I eagerly await Part Two. Seeing how he's probably the person most responsible for inflicting Trump on us, I'd love to see Sheldon Adelson make an appearance -- maybe he could get shot in a hall of mirrors by the Falwell's poolboy. Hey, it may not be funny but it's something I like to imagine sometimes. I'm working this out in therapy.

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"Later in the day, reports from Italy confirm that a ragtag band of American militiamen, QAnon adherents, and Latin Mass cultists, calling themselves the “JFK Jr. Brigade,” has attempted to overthrow the Pope; most are killed by Swiss Guards, but one of the few survivors is revealed to be white supremacist Richard Spencer, for whom Rod Dreher of The American Conservative organizes a “Free Richard” campaign."

Now THAT I would love to see! High Larious!

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The best part is when Rudy cites the rightwing attack as an example of the leftwing anti-Catholicism the right is firmly against.

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This had better have a happy ending (no not that kind, eugghhhh) or I'll hate you forever, Roy.

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Don't blame me! I can only cast shadows.

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I want to find the Simpsons writer who years ago wrote about President Trump and either perform an exorcism or send him back to his proper timeline.

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Loved the whole thing. Great kicker

"When told by reporters that photos of completed ballots are illegal in Ohio, Trump campaign manager Bill Stepien, swigging from a 40-ounce bottle of Colt 45, tells them, “ha, like bribes aren’t!”

Timely too. https://www.wsj.com/articles/bribery-probe-into-a-nuclear-plant-bailout-examines-facilities-owner-11602688931

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