25 Comments

I hope Trump doesn’t fire Mulvaney only because I will miss him in these skits. He’s my personal favorite. “Who wants a prostitute,” LOL.

It's already been said a million times, but Pence is one of the passengers in the Trump clown car who’s so incompetent that hitting the urinal on the first squirt ranks as an accomplishment for him, so of course he was put in charge of coordinating with multiple federal agencies to monitor and contain a dangerous pandemic. Our current timeline is being scripted by Armando Iannucci.

Expand full comment

I've been under the impression that Pence is doing any coordinating (i.e., real work to contain the virus) so much as he is intended to be the sole mouthpiece for the administration's line(s).

Expand full comment

(Uh...I meant, is NOT doing any coordinating).

Expand full comment

I sometimes feel like the past couple of decades are largely a conspiracy to make me, personally, turn against democracy.

Expand full comment

Democracy is arguably already dead so you can save the energy of turning against it.

Expand full comment

Roy's Mulvaney is far nicer than the real one for whom no punishment is inappropriate.

Expand full comment

What Hath Reaganism Wrought: A Continuing Series

Expand full comment

See? It's far from just the Don. Entire party (and complicit Dems) have to go.

Expand full comment

As a medical professional with years of experience going all the way back to the Swine Flu Scare in 1976, may I say that I cannot recall a potential epidemic being managed by a more incompetent gaggle of morons and sycophants, led by an ignorant narcissist and his uneducated godbotherer VP. Jeez, even Dr. Tom "Show Me the Money" Price would be better than these bozos. Although I don't wish ill any anyone (outside the administration), I wonder how that imaginary guy who told his wife his 401K went up 100% feels now?

Expand full comment

Meanwhile in stupid land, we had a good run.

"5W Public Relations said that 38% of Americans wouldn't buy Corona "under any circumstances" because of the outbreak, and another 14% said they wouldn't order a Corona in public. The survey encompasses polling from 737 beer drinkers in the United States."

https://twitter.com/cnni/status/1233393636672446464

Expand full comment

Fiddlesticks.

Expand full comment

As long as Pacifico is OK we’re doing fine.

Expand full comment

https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefings-statements/remarks-president-trump-vice-president-pence-members-coronavirus-task-force-press-conference/

Here's the link to Trump's coronavirus presser yesterday, worth reading just for the insanity. Pence and Azar speak briefly but mostly to give Trump a tongue bath about his wonderful "leadership". Trump is his usual incoherent self, unable to even manage the handful of talking points he recycles over and over. I particularly like what I call the "very-verys": How his administration is "very, very ready for this," the specialist who's "very, very tremendously talented", how they're working with Congress "very, very carefully, very strongly", and "We’re still very, very — we’re doing great." Ad nauseum.

My favorite idiocy is in response to a question whether U.S. schools should be preparing for a coronavirus spreading. Trump thinks yes, but, "I don’t think it’s going to come to that, especially with the fact that we’re going down, not up. We’re going very substantially down, not up."

Yes, just remember that in the coming weeks. We are going very substantially down, not up.

Expand full comment

We’ve been going very substantially down since January 2017.

Expand full comment

'We are all going down…together.'

(The morning of 2001-09-12, the D.J. on WFMU began his show with "O Superman (For Massenet"; he claimed that he had completely forgot that line and, for that matter, 'Here come the planes', he was just sad and wanted to hear something sad.)

Expand full comment

I’m taking a proofreading and editing course and I decided to tackle this presser. It took a while but I finally came up with:

“I...know...nothing...”

I think that about covers it.

Expand full comment

Meanwhile I just read in Smithsonian mag online that In Florida (where else?) there’s a “horde of herpes infected monkeys.” Quick, send Pence there! Keep them away from Mar-al-Pendejo! (Rubio can help, too.)

Expand full comment

I asked the shopkeeper using a N.Y. "Post" with the President on the front page as a visual aid «Perdone que no puedo bien hablar, pero: ¿Pendejo o cabrón?»; he said «Pendejo» and nodded sagely.

Expand full comment

Es verdad, por cierto.

Expand full comment

I believe godly Pence's treatment for STDs is malignant neglect, to paraphrase Tricky Dick Nixon.

Expand full comment

"Just look tough and sound smart and no matter how many people die you’re gonna look like a million bucks." Roy encapsulates the entire Trump philosophy in one brilliant sentence.

Expand full comment

Pence is so non an entity he said he would pray for him and DJ didn't even blink

Expand full comment

I swear to God, when I first glanced at this, I thought it said slack jawed Kushner.

Expand full comment

"...and then it’s like someone’s torturing a monkey. Disgusting."

It's him. It's him in spades. 'As he passes KUSHNER he rips off his respirator mask.'

To a tee.

Expand full comment