You know, it does seem a bit... um... sus that all these big strong MAGA types are drinking Bud Light. I mean, it sounds a bit... you know... less serious and less manly, maybe than an alternative?
Maybe if the name were changed to Bud Jock that could amend matters.
Also, Dylan was so adorable in that Holly Golightly look.
I get a kick out of Bud's image as a "manly" beer. My father, working class guy, called Bud a ladies' beer. He drank the real stuff - Utica Club, Genesee, Black Label.
In, of course, a camo can. And the caps and the exclamation point are mandatory. Then they could get that putz in the khaki T-shirt to do the ads. Maybe a hand strangling George Soros on the label.
I always figured the point of Lite beer is that you can drink twice as much and still drive home? Left unanswered is why anyone would want to drink twice as much of the stuff. Is it the opportunity to crush twice as many aluminum cans with your big, manly hands?
Some people prefer lite beer when boating on the lake, to avoid getting either sloshed or bloated by drinking too much heavier stuff. The extra water in it helps.
Still, shouldn’t traditional Real Men be drinking nothing but shitty beer like Old Style and Schlitz? Something that tastes like it was filtered through a skunk’s britches?
Even back in the Hamm's days--before my time--they hated Buttwiper.
Brock-for-Broglio also had more than a little racial aspect about it. A couple of years previously the Cubs rolled out the "College of Coaches," where the coaches would rotate managing the team for three months or so. Worthies such as Lou Klein, Elvin Tappe and Vedie Himsl, all Cubs coaches, were named "head coach".
One man was never named "head coach" -- the first Black coach in Cubs history, and the man who scouted and signed Lou Brock (and Ernie Banks) -- Buck O'Neil. O'Neil was sent back to scouting, and shortly afterwards Lou Brock was traded.
And the Woke St, Louis Cardinals signed Brock, no doubt because of some corporate DEI initiative or affirmative action program, choosing him over more qualified White players just to please the Woke Mob, and Brock was never heard from again .
Most working class guys I know drink lite beer of some sort. The reason is that it’s so weak they can down an 18 pack over the course of the race, game, barbecue, whatever.
DeSantis be onto somethin'. Why (fer a small fee), I'd show him how to combine his sorry-ass idea about a theme park (what 'theme"? Inhumanityille?) with the obvious need for more state prisons (he's on his way to criminalizing pretty much everything so he'll need the space). Prisoners work for free, or they don't eat (at least that's my play, and I think he'll go along because of course he would), so staff the theme park with 'em. There's yer 80% profit incentive right there. In fact, he could just nuke gay Disney and do the the theme park anyway.
I'm starting to suspect that the proprietor here is visiting midwest diners, and interviewing Real Americans for their opinions, then portraying those opinions as the positions of the Great Respected Politicians in this piece.
Dear Sir, as a midwesterner from the Heartland™️, allow me to take you to one of our traditional diners like Sanaa’s Mediterranean Cuisine or Skogen Kitchen. There I will introduce you to Bud-drinking salt-of-the-earth people who… [man in Carharts whispers in ear] Er, let me start over.
We've already had Donald Trump. He actually does wear heels. And makeup. And spends an hour on his hair. And get manicures and pedicures. Just like real working men do.
I'm not a lawyer, but if I were one of Disney's corporate lawyers, I'd be thrilled that DeSantis has decided to single out the company for special discriminatory treatment over what is very clearly free speech. Last time I looked, "selective enforcement" was still illegal. Passing laws to specifically penalize one person or entity is also illegal.
And, of course, trying to damage the state's largest employer and one of its biggest tourist draws is just nuts. But I guess Florida Man don't care about actual governance when there's libs to be owned.
Meanwhile, the rest of the GOP is now in a headlong race to see which wildly unpopular policies they can showcase and implement. They'll be down to the rump 27% crazy vote in just a couple of years.
"Florida Man don't care about actual governance when there's libs to be owned."
This fancy-pants word, "governance" raises alarm bells because it's suspiciously close to "government" and we all know THAT'S evil.
Meanwhile, Florida and the rest of the gulf coast are seeing world-record sea level rise to the point where Miami regularly floods, and stronger hurricanes have pushed home insurance rates into the stratosphere. Are these problems? Should we do something about them? Hey, look, Goofy's carryin' a rainbow flag!
Soon, homeowner insurance in Florida will be very affordable because THERE WON'T BE ANY COMPANIES WILLING TO INSURE HOMES IN FLORIDA!
I take that back. There will be plenty of such companies, but they will be state-sponsored grifting operations. Pay your $2000/month premium, but expect to have all claims denied and your policy canceled should anything happen.
Don't live there, thank God, but I wonder if this was an issue in DeSantis' recent landslide election? If not, does anyone know what issues did come up in the campaign? What did Charlie Crist talk about, if anything?
Crist is a zombie politician. He's been dead for more than a decade, but keeps eating the brains of Democratic consultants. You have to wonder just how many times and in how many ways Florida's voters have to reject Crist before Democrats stop running him?
DeSantis, of course, ran on all those great red-meat issues for all the great Red meatheads. For an awful lot of awful people, just promising to make someone else's life worse is more than enough to merit devotion.
Ah, Democratic consultants. After Judge Janet's recent 11-point win in the Wisconsin Supreme Court race, it occurred to me that her being a candidate for Supreme Court meant she couldn't run on "jobs, jobs, jobs" which did free her up to talk about something else, and that something else turned out to be a winning issue. But never mind, we could all have three jobs and Democrats in Wisconsin would still run every damn campaign on "jobs, jobs, jobs."
James Carville said "It's the economy, stupid" THIRTY FUCKING YEARS AGO and they haven't allowed a single other idea to enter their brainpans since then. "It won for Bill Clinton, and it'll win for YOU TOO!"
"Kitchen table issues" is what all the hot consultants call it. When you start pressing them on what that means, it quickly degenerates into babbling about jobs-n-healthcare as just broad-brush nonsense.
Up north here, she ran ads about being a former prosecutor and how fair a judge she is, plus cops saying Kelly’s ad were lies. Nary a word about abortion or gerrymandering. Very smart, good work; save that stuff for the southern half of the state and don’t get the rednecks up here riled up.
Apr 18, 2023·edited Apr 18, 2023Liked by Roy Edroso
Another grade-A banger, Roy. The Cruelty is the Profit Point – grift, grift, grift.
Going after Disney, beer, supermarkets, a popular furniture chain. Republicans truly have their fingers on the pulse of what normies want from their politicians.
Even if he goes all in and tries to one-up Trump by shooting someone on Main Street USA at Disneyworld, I maintain DeSantis would be a goddamn fool to run in 2024, Trump will first flay and then beat him. And after all, Ron is only 44 years old! Every sane advisor should be telling him to keep his powder dry for 2028. Mind you, the way he’s prematurely aging he may look like the Crypt Keeper by then. Which could give him the gravitas he’s been lacking, LOL. But there’s no conceivable remedy for his lack of charisma.
Jesus Roy , I'll tell you what- good thing you're the one writing this - why, if you were reading it , in your condition, you might could bust a gut laughing.
DeSantis is about to jump on the macho beer bandwagon and issue an executive order for mandatory genital inspection prior to purchase or consumption. The CEOs of Hooters and several Florida "breastaurants" are already on board.
First lol of the morning "— and I do mean he, though women may occasionally sip a light beer or two if they work as waitresses or lady detectives —" Welcome back, Roy.
Ordinarily, this reference would be cruel and unusual, but the subject of Greg Abbott frequently gets me to wondering, "where's Tommy Udo when you really need him?" https://youtu.be/3oesSyvh76g
Michel Doukeris, Brazilian CEO of AB InBev, parent company of Anheuser Busch, invited Senator Hawley to visit his office in Belgium to discuss his company’s policies. During his talk with reporters he called Hawley a “punheta,” exclaimed “porra nehuma” to Hawley’s proposal, and finished by saying, “nem fodemdo that xoxota is gonna tell me what to do, olho do cu!”
I kinda like the prison idea. Makes the contrast clearer, you know? On one side of the highway there's Blue World, which is all friendly and welcoming (providing you've got the money to pay to get in, of course) on the other side is Red World, which is a fucking prison.
I watched a little--mere seconds--of De Santis' press conference, and all I could think of was that he and Ben Shapiro would make a fine nerdy-chipmunk Batman and Robin.
You know, it does seem a bit... um... sus that all these big strong MAGA types are drinking Bud Light. I mean, it sounds a bit... you know... less serious and less manly, maybe than an alternative?
Maybe if the name were changed to Bud Jock that could amend matters.
Also, Dylan was so adorable in that Holly Golightly look.
Any way you look at it, it's piss.
you mean Bud is just charging us to filter their fine product?
Hey, Roy, take it easy. No heavy lifting for a while!
Doc says I can hit softballs
Ah, so we can expect more Peggy Noonan during your recovery?
DeSantis Florida Fascist Follies have moved to to approve of entities whom I loath: Disney and Anheuser Busch.
And Ron is becoming the Wile. E Coyote of politics..
I'm hoping our rerun of fascism approximates Marx's "first as tragedy, then as farce" dictum...At least we get come laughs.
bud jock? sure, why not? they're all likely a bit 'light' in the jock.
I get a kick out of Bud's image as a "manly" beer. My father, working class guy, called Bud a ladies' beer. He drank the real stuff - Utica Club, Genesee, Black Label.
"Hey Mabel! Black Label!"
It was manly in that it exercised your bladder.
But you know, 'round my way we used to call Genessee "Genny Cream Ale," which must have been the most femme beer name of the era.
The Cream Ale is just one of the Genny line of products. And it's not bad these days, new ownership has upped the game.
That's a genuine surprise
stout fellows
TAC BEER!
In, of course, a camo can. And the caps and the exclamation point are mandatory. Then they could get that putz in the khaki T-shirt to do the ads. Maybe a hand strangling George Soros on the label.
Please don't give them ideas.
I always figured the point of Lite beer is that you can drink twice as much and still drive home? Left unanswered is why anyone would want to drink twice as much of the stuff. Is it the opportunity to crush twice as many aluminum cans with your big, manly hands?
Of course, Hawley drinks light beer because he needs to stay light on his feet in case he needs to run from a mob he instigated.
Or the opportunity to spend more time at the urinal?
No, no, no you can drink twice as much and still maintain your slim, trim figure. No beer gut. Dylan is perfect.
Some people prefer lite beer when boating on the lake, to avoid getting either sloshed or bloated by drinking too much heavier stuff. The extra water in it helps.
Still, shouldn’t traditional Real Men be drinking nothing but shitty beer like Old Style and Schlitz? Something that tastes like it was filtered through a skunk’s britches?
The Log Cabin boyfriend paired Bud Lite with cocaine: as you didn't taste it after the first one, it was perfect.
"Buttwiper", as the Bleacher Bums at Wrigley Field used to refer to it back in the '70s. (They were devotees of Old Style.)
LOL, do you think any of those guys could have actually told the difference in a blind taste test?
Also, the Busch family owned the St. Louis Cardinals. Probably a factor.
Cubs fans have many, many resentments. I can easily imagine a direct line from Bud-hatin' back to the Brock for Broglio trade.
Hearted only because I always like to read about stupid trades OTHER teams make.
Even back in the Hamm's days--before my time--they hated Buttwiper.
Brock-for-Broglio also had more than a little racial aspect about it. A couple of years previously the Cubs rolled out the "College of Coaches," where the coaches would rotate managing the team for three months or so. Worthies such as Lou Klein, Elvin Tappe and Vedie Himsl, all Cubs coaches, were named "head coach".
One man was never named "head coach" -- the first Black coach in Cubs history, and the man who scouted and signed Lou Brock (and Ernie Banks) -- Buck O'Neil. O'Neil was sent back to scouting, and shortly afterwards Lou Brock was traded.
And the Woke St, Louis Cardinals signed Brock, no doubt because of some corporate DEI initiative or affirmative action program, choosing him over more qualified White players just to please the Woke Mob, and Brock was never heard from again .
AB apologized to the assholes. Fuck 'em and their shitty beer.
Most working class guys I know drink lite beer of some sort. The reason is that it’s so weak they can down an 18 pack over the course of the race, game, barbecue, whatever.
But... WHY?
DeSantis be onto somethin'. Why (fer a small fee), I'd show him how to combine his sorry-ass idea about a theme park (what 'theme"? Inhumanityille?) with the obvious need for more state prisons (he's on his way to criminalizing pretty much everything so he'll need the space). Prisoners work for free, or they don't eat (at least that's my play, and I think he'll go along because of course he would), so staff the theme park with 'em. There's yer 80% profit incentive right there. In fact, he could just nuke gay Disney and do the the theme park anyway.
Have his "people" call my people.
and there's this:
"waitresses or lady detectives"
to give us all warm fuzzies...ROY'S BACK!
My sentiments exactly!!!
I'm starting to suspect that the proprietor here is visiting midwest diners, and interviewing Real Americans for their opinions, then portraying those opinions as the positions of the Great Respected Politicians in this piece.
So you think his "hospital visit" was just a macguffin?
I heard he was actually on a secret mission to kill Putin, the guy you see playing Putin on your TV is just a body double.
Dear Sir, as a midwesterner from the Heartland™️, allow me to take you to one of our traditional diners like Sanaa’s Mediterranean Cuisine or Skogen Kitchen. There I will introduce you to Bud-drinking salt-of-the-earth people who… [man in Carharts whispers in ear] Er, let me start over.
Amused, of course; too much content for these scumbags (by which I mean the entire GOP) is far from enough.
But the quote at the head of the post raises the question: Is America ready for a male POTUS who wears three inch heels?
We've already had Donald Trump. He actually does wear heels. And makeup. And spends an hour on his hair. And get manicures and pedicures. Just like real working men do.
And yet, the results...
And drinks diet coke, that's as lite as it gets.
Don’t forget the natural-looking orange makeup.
Dunno that Donnie wears heels like Ronnie does. Other than that, yes, of course, you’re correct.
Donnie wears "lifts."
They had him at 6'3" in his fake mugshot. Of course, at least 3" was hair.
"Hair"
I'mo hijack the thread down below and drop it right here: "Gravitas boots"
I'm not a lawyer, but if I were one of Disney's corporate lawyers, I'd be thrilled that DeSantis has decided to single out the company for special discriminatory treatment over what is very clearly free speech. Last time I looked, "selective enforcement" was still illegal. Passing laws to specifically penalize one person or entity is also illegal.
And, of course, trying to damage the state's largest employer and one of its biggest tourist draws is just nuts. But I guess Florida Man don't care about actual governance when there's libs to be owned.
Meanwhile, the rest of the GOP is now in a headlong race to see which wildly unpopular policies they can showcase and implement. They'll be down to the rump 27% crazy vote in just a couple of years.
"Florida Man don't care about actual governance when there's libs to be owned."
This fancy-pants word, "governance" raises alarm bells because it's suspiciously close to "government" and we all know THAT'S evil.
Meanwhile, Florida and the rest of the gulf coast are seeing world-record sea level rise to the point where Miami regularly floods, and stronger hurricanes have pushed home insurance rates into the stratosphere. Are these problems? Should we do something about them? Hey, look, Goofy's carryin' a rainbow flag!
Soon, homeowner insurance in Florida will be very affordable because THERE WON'T BE ANY COMPANIES WILLING TO INSURE HOMES IN FLORIDA!
I take that back. There will be plenty of such companies, but they will be state-sponsored grifting operations. Pay your $2000/month premium, but expect to have all claims denied and your policy canceled should anything happen.
Don't live there, thank God, but I wonder if this was an issue in DeSantis' recent landslide election? If not, does anyone know what issues did come up in the campaign? What did Charlie Crist talk about, if anything?
Crist is a zombie politician. He's been dead for more than a decade, but keeps eating the brains of Democratic consultants. You have to wonder just how many times and in how many ways Florida's voters have to reject Crist before Democrats stop running him?
DeSantis, of course, ran on all those great red-meat issues for all the great Red meatheads. For an awful lot of awful people, just promising to make someone else's life worse is more than enough to merit devotion.
Ah, Democratic consultants. After Judge Janet's recent 11-point win in the Wisconsin Supreme Court race, it occurred to me that her being a candidate for Supreme Court meant she couldn't run on "jobs, jobs, jobs" which did free her up to talk about something else, and that something else turned out to be a winning issue. But never mind, we could all have three jobs and Democrats in Wisconsin would still run every damn campaign on "jobs, jobs, jobs."
James Carville said "It's the economy, stupid" THIRTY FUCKING YEARS AGO and they haven't allowed a single other idea to enter their brainpans since then. "It won for Bill Clinton, and it'll win for YOU TOO!"
"Kitchen table issues" is what all the hot consultants call it. When you start pressing them on what that means, it quickly degenerates into babbling about jobs-n-healthcare as just broad-brush nonsense.
Up north here, she ran ads about being a former prosecutor and how fair a judge she is, plus cops saying Kelly’s ad were lies. Nary a word about abortion or gerrymandering. Very smart, good work; save that stuff for the southern half of the state and don’t get the rednecks up here riled up.
“Pay your $2000/month premium, but expect to have all claims denied and your policy canceled should anything happen”
So, like health insurance then?
Another grade-A banger, Roy. The Cruelty is the Profit Point – grift, grift, grift.
Going after Disney, beer, supermarkets, a popular furniture chain. Republicans truly have their fingers on the pulse of what normies want from their politicians.
Even if he goes all in and tries to one-up Trump by shooting someone on Main Street USA at Disneyworld, I maintain DeSantis would be a goddamn fool to run in 2024, Trump will first flay and then beat him. And after all, Ron is only 44 years old! Every sane advisor should be telling him to keep his powder dry for 2028. Mind you, the way he’s prematurely aging he may look like the Crypt Keeper by then. Which could give him the gravitas he’s been lacking, LOL. But there’s no conceivable remedy for his lack of charisma.
If looking dead imparts gravitas, then yeah, bring it on.
Actually being dead imparts even more gravitas. Just sayin'.
Well, it worked for Lincoln, MLK Jr., and JFKs (both Sr. and Jr.) all of whom they hated while alive.
on the other hand, I'm hearing a lot of good things about frederick Douglass.
Nothing America loves more than a dead civil-rights leader.
Heartened for the troof, replied for the OOF!
Ol' Puddin' Fingers going all-in on beating up on a beloved American institution like The Mouse? Can't see that going horribly wrong for him.
"Skiz-a-diz-phunga"
Jesus Roy , I'll tell you what- good thing you're the one writing this - why, if you were reading it , in your condition, you might could bust a gut laughing.
“Oof gehoofen tooten”
DeSantis is about to jump on the macho beer bandwagon and issue an executive order for mandatory genital inspection prior to purchase or consumption. The CEOs of Hooters and several Florida "breastaurants" are already on board.
2 marks for "breastaurants", but
Oof.
First lol of the morning "— and I do mean he, though women may occasionally sip a light beer or two if they work as waitresses or lady detectives —" Welcome back, Roy.
Ah. So that’s why I don’t recall seeing him in heels.
Ordinarily, this reference would be cruel and unusual, but the subject of Greg Abbott frequently gets me to wondering, "where's Tommy Udo when you really need him?" https://youtu.be/3oesSyvh76g
PS: IKEA's American HQ is in Conshohocken? Well, the Swedes did beat Billy Penn to Philly, so there's that.
Wingers announce their Contract On America.
Michel Doukeris, Brazilian CEO of AB InBev, parent company of Anheuser Busch, invited Senator Hawley to visit his office in Belgium to discuss his company’s policies. During his talk with reporters he called Hawley a “punheta,” exclaimed “porra nehuma” to Hawley’s proposal, and finished by saying, “nem fodemdo that xoxota is gonna tell me what to do, olho do cu!”
MASTRIANO: "And what I said about Wawa goes double for Sheetz. Take that, ya coffee drinkin' Yinzers."
I kinda like the prison idea. Makes the contrast clearer, you know? On one side of the highway there's Blue World, which is all friendly and welcoming (providing you've got the money to pay to get in, of course) on the other side is Red World, which is a fucking prison.
Anybody who tries to escape from Red World to Blue World gets shot on sight, you know, like a woman seeking an abortion.
I watched a little--mere seconds--of De Santis' press conference, and all I could think of was that he and Ben Shapiro would make a fine nerdy-chipmunk Batman and Robin.