This is a pretty good pitch, but I have a couple of notes:
Shaquandra should be a lesbian – there’s always a gay best friend in these Hallmark stories.
We need some background/origin story for Simone. How does one become both a doctor and lawyer while also being certifiably insane? I suggest at night school “programs,” the kind that used to advertise inside matchbook covers.
Hilarious as always. I don't know if anyone calls them this, but Camel Lights are now Camel Blues. You can even get Camel Blue 99's -- which I guess sounds cooler than 100's. (I was a smoker long ago so I looked it up just to see if they still existed.)
At first, I thought she'd run for Congress on the line, "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Nelson Mandela", and then I realized it'd more likely be "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Adolf Hitler."
Simone’s judge dissed her so good: “You’re smart,a doctor. You should be proud. But you’re a criminal piece of remorseless shit who used your prosecution to falsely claim your 1st Amendment rights were being trampled to raise $433,000 off the morons who believe you, you fucking asshole.” (Edited for length.)
Going forward, I shall appraise all skirt suits as to their degree of slatternlyness.
"Anal, for a carton of Camel Lights?"
Jesus , Roy- this shit is hilarious.
...rather slatternly...
Also, Happy Frank Wills Day.
This is a pretty good pitch, but I have a couple of notes:
Shaquandra should be a lesbian – there’s always a gay best friend in these Hallmark stories.
We need some background/origin story for Simone. How does one become both a doctor and lawyer while also being certifiably insane? I suggest at night school “programs,” the kind that used to advertise inside matchbook covers.
Other than that, it’s a green light.
Heather Cox Richardson reporting:
Jamie Raskin said yesterday: “New evidence is breaking every single day now. Suddenly, a lot of people want to tell the truth.”
It appears that the former president thinks the same thing. Before today’s hearing, he wrote: “I DEMAND EQUAL TIME!!!”
Fair enough, boyo. 20 years seems equitable.
“Orange is the New Quack” coming to the Hallmark channel this fall.
Is this going to be on the Ben Shapiro network?
It's a new Netflix hit called "Qrange is the New BlacQ"!
Just curious. Now that she's convicted, does this mean she no longer has lawyer credentials?
Amazing: Both brilliant and deliriously lurid.
Sorry to say, though, I know I shouldn’t be but I’m amused by this:
WARDEN: [Kindly, Wilford Brimleyesque] Tsk tsk, Simone, what am I gonna do with you?
SIMONE: Anal, for a carton of Camel Lights?
Oh, so she's Queen Ivermectin? That explains a few things.
Hilarious as always. I don't know if anyone calls them this, but Camel Lights are now Camel Blues. You can even get Camel Blue 99's -- which I guess sounds cooler than 100's. (I was a smoker long ago so I looked it up just to see if they still existed.)
OMG! Snort, cackle, laugh, titter, tee-hee, squeal, gasp, gag, choke, wheeze, hoot, hee-hee, ho-ho, ha-ha, guffaw, holler, howl, spit, lol, giggle, chortle, cough, lol, lulz, roflmao, double over, wet my pants.
At first, I thought she'd run for Congress on the line, "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Nelson Mandela", and then I realized it'd more likely be "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Adolf Hitler."
Her asking the "waiter" if it's free-range reminds me of a bit from the old Nat. Lampoon Radio Hour, set in a Club Fed-type white collar prison:
MAN 1: Psst! Spread the word! Tonight at midnight we're going over the wall.
MAN 2: Not in THESE pants, I'm not.
Simone’s judge dissed her so good: “You’re smart,a doctor. You should be proud. But you’re a criminal piece of remorseless shit who used your prosecution to falsely claim your 1st Amendment rights were being trampled to raise $433,000 off the morons who believe you, you fucking asshole.” (Edited for length.)
Emmy history in the making. WifordB-esque: it's the right thing to do!