Funny how the one lesson Republicans learned from Watergate was that it was the coverup that did Nixon in, so commit all your crimes out in the open. If you're going to ask Russia to steal your opponents emails, or if you're going to ask your supporters to overthrow the government, just make sure you do it from a podium in front of a dozen cameras and thousands of your screaming fans.
This is a pretty good pitch, but I have a couple of notes:
Shaquandra should be a lesbian – there’s always a gay best friend in these Hallmark stories.
We need some background/origin story for Simone. How does one become both a doctor and lawyer while also being certifiably insane? I suggest at night school “programs,” the kind that used to advertise inside matchbook covers.
She might lose her California medical license but not for this, for all the COVID lies. I guess in Cali you can practice treason and medicine at the same time.
Again, prison rape is just always going to be endemically funny to a society acculturated to impotent fantasies of retribution & addicted to the existence of prisons. But it's cool when it happens to the other side.
I'm not calling out our host, because the line has a satirical edge to it & reflects a sad reality for incarecerated women. Good satire should make its reader feel shame at their complacency in accepting awful things in our society.
Oh, I know, hence the guilt. But what transcended the guilt was what was my feeling for the execution of the joke. So not so much, or only, the joke but the delivery is what put it over.
Of course it was offensive but for me it worked despite it.
That said, the prison rape matter is barely the tip of the iceberg in a system initially designed to be cruel and sadistic but now exists to enrich more special interests than ever.
As for the cool when it happens to the other side, well, I’m very cool with truly bad actors being punished for bad acts. I don’t focus too much on the how of the punishment.
Hilarious as always. I don't know if anyone calls them this, but Camel Lights are now Camel Blues. You can even get Camel Blue 99's -- which I guess sounds cooler than 100's. (I was a smoker long ago so I looked it up just to see if they still existed.)
At first, I thought she'd run for Congress on the line, "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Nelson Mandela", and then I realized it'd more likely be "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Adolf Hitler."
Plus a reliable 3 squares and a cot. Probly her reason too (I sincerely hope she is reading this, because it is a good thing when the mocked know they are well and truly mocked.)
Simone’s judge dissed her so good: “You’re smart,a doctor. You should be proud. But you’re a criminal piece of remorseless shit who used your prosecution to falsely claim your 1st Amendment rights were being trampled to raise $433,000 off the morons who believe you, you fucking asshole.” (Edited for length.)
Going forward, I shall appraise all skirt suits as to their degree of slatternlyness.
"Anal, for a carton of Camel Lights?"
Jesus , Roy- this shit is hilarious.
roy may simply be channeling the boebert diaries.
Also, indicates her double (or is it triple) major in Econ.
...rather slatternly...
Also, Happy Frank Wills Day.
Funny how the one lesson Republicans learned from Watergate was that it was the coverup that did Nixon in, so commit all your crimes out in the open. If you're going to ask Russia to steal your opponents emails, or if you're going to ask your supporters to overthrow the government, just make sure you do it from a podium in front of a dozen cameras and thousands of your screaming fans.
Thousands of MY screaming fans is still but a fond dream...
Would settle for hundreds...
Dozens...?
Some guy with a mop an' broom backstage...?
Damn. This is starting to sound like the Hinckley '22 Tour...
Your momma's glasses so thick, she look at a map & sees people waving at her
This is a pretty good pitch, but I have a couple of notes:
Shaquandra should be a lesbian – there’s always a gay best friend in these Hallmark stories.
We need some background/origin story for Simone. How does one become both a doctor and lawyer while also being certifiably insane? I suggest at night school “programs,” the kind that used to advertise inside matchbook covers.
Other than that, it’s a green light.
Pure genius.
Thanks!
Heather Cox Richardson reporting:
Jamie Raskin said yesterday: “New evidence is breaking every single day now. Suddenly, a lot of people want to tell the truth.”
It appears that the former president thinks the same thing. Before today’s hearing, he wrote: “I DEMAND EQUAL TIME!!!”
Fair enough, boyo. 20 years seems equitable.
"Fair enough, boyo. 20 years seems equitable."
*Life* plus 20. In Gitmo. For starters.
No, haven't you heard? Treating former Presidents like they're mere citizens subject to the law makes us a banana republic like France.
France Gots Bananas!
Yes We Have No Banana Republic
“Orange is the New Quack” coming to the Hallmark channel this fall.
The Law-Crank Redemption
Is this going to be on the Ben Shapiro network?
Eventually!
I have no problem with you selling out in this way!
It's a new Netflix hit called "Qrange is the New BlacQ"!
Just curious. Now that she's convicted, does this mean she no longer has lawyer credentials?
She might lose her California medical license but not for this, for all the COVID lies. I guess in Cali you can practice treason and medicine at the same time.
Amazing: Both brilliant and deliriously lurid.
Sorry to say, though, I know I shouldn’t be but I’m amused by this:
WARDEN: [Kindly, Wilford Brimleyesque] Tsk tsk, Simone, what am I gonna do with you?
SIMONE: Anal, for a carton of Camel Lights?
Again, prison rape is just always going to be endemically funny to a society acculturated to impotent fantasies of retribution & addicted to the existence of prisons. But it's cool when it happens to the other side.
I'm not calling out our host, because the line has a satirical edge to it & reflects a sad reality for incarecerated women. Good satire should make its reader feel shame at their complacency in accepting awful things in our society.
Oh, I know, hence the guilt. But what transcended the guilt was what was my feeling for the execution of the joke. So not so much, or only, the joke but the delivery is what put it over.
Of course it was offensive but for me it worked despite it.
That said, the prison rape matter is barely the tip of the iceberg in a system initially designed to be cruel and sadistic but now exists to enrich more special interests than ever.
As for the cool when it happens to the other side, well, I’m very cool with truly bad actors being punished for bad acts. I don’t focus too much on the how of the punishment.
Absolutely -- it was well-designed
I laughed my ass off, then I felt bad because of “ass.”
Why ever would you do that?
Oh, so she's Queen Ivermectin? That explains a few things.
Hilarious as always. I don't know if anyone calls them this, but Camel Lights are now Camel Blues. You can even get Camel Blue 99's -- which I guess sounds cooler than 100's. (I was a smoker long ago so I looked it up just to see if they still existed.)
OMG! Snort, cackle, laugh, titter, tee-hee, squeal, gasp, gag, choke, wheeze, hoot, hee-hee, ho-ho, ha-ha, guffaw, holler, howl, spit, lol, giggle, chortle, cough, lol, lulz, roflmao, double over, wet my pants.
At first, I thought she'd run for Congress on the line, "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Nelson Mandela", and then I realized it'd more likely be "I went to prison for my beliefs, just like Adolf Hitler."
Plus a reliable 3 squares and a cot. Probly her reason too (I sincerely hope she is reading this, because it is a good thing when the mocked know they are well and truly mocked.)
Her asking the "waiter" if it's free-range reminds me of a bit from the old Nat. Lampoon Radio Hour, set in a Club Fed-type white collar prison:
MAN 1: Psst! Spread the word! Tonight at midnight we're going over the wall.
MAN 2: Not in THESE pants, I'm not.
Simone’s judge dissed her so good: “You’re smart,a doctor. You should be proud. But you’re a criminal piece of remorseless shit who used your prosecution to falsely claim your 1st Amendment rights were being trampled to raise $433,000 off the morons who believe you, you fucking asshole.” (Edited for length.)
Emmy history in the making. WifordB-esque: it's the right thing to do!