73 Comments

Amused by the post, but the conclusion cracked me because I'm awful human being.

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And we love ya fer it!

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The thing is, it's that Existential Certainty Donnie has rather worse kompromat on Gaetz.

There's a news item Matt's daddy, a longtime FLA. Senate president, chased out in 2013, for Medicare fraud suit he settled with the Justice Department for an undisclosed amount, is going to run for his seat again.

One wonders if he sees Matt on the way out.

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Exactly the sort of sleazy input I depend on from Roy's cohort. We few, we happy, slightly jaundiced and paranoid few...

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Is Medicare fraud Florida's leading business enterprise? I mean, it's a fertile field for the crop, like corn farms in Iowa, but having practically every other politician making a living from it seems a little over the top.

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Used to be fleecing the rubes by selling swamp land as home sites, then they drained all the swamps.

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I liked Florida better as it was in the Marx Brothers’ “Cocoanuts.”

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I'll throw in "Flying Down to Rio" and "Some Like it Hot." Other Floridas need not apply.

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Swamps be all "Hold my cyanobacteria".

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"Oh, can you get stucco."

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Gaetz the Younger is running for Robotic Rick Scott’s seat.

Too, Gaetz the Elder may be expecting Gaetz the Younger to be expelled due to a pending ethics investigation.

OTOH, who cares?

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Gates the Swinger?

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If you mean Bill Gates, well, yeah, swinging or at least infidelity is what got him divorced. If you mean Matt (Humbert) Gaetz, it has to be qualified as pedophilia swinging or, maybe better, statutory swinging.

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Speaker Gaetz chooses not to respond. 'Twould be beneath the dignity of the office doncha know...

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If u say so, luv...

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"I wish all of Rome had but one neck, that I could kill it with a single blow."

-Attributed to Emperor Gaius Caligula.

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Outrageous satire or a fly on the wall perspective of just another day at Mar-a-Lago?

Olbermann played an excerpt from a speech Trump gave to the California Republicans. He was talking about being in an electric car that had somehow wrecked into the ocean . He was worried about sitting on the battery in the water and getting electrocuted. Then he started talking about there being sharks in the water and how he would rather be electrocuted than eaten by a shark. His voice sounded terrible - like a weird fucked up parody of himself. What he was saying was fuckbonkers. If the guy two booths down from you at Applebee's was saying shit like that you'd pick up your plate and move to the other side of the Salad bar from him. And the staff would understand completely.

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Sneeze guard be all "Don't count on me to save you from THAT!"

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Yep. Trump doesn’t have Machiavellian skills, just low cunning and a rampaging ego with enough money to have never before been called out for any of it. Also, the best way to blackmail Gaetz would be to have video evidence he had sex with a woman over 30.

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"Best way to blackmail" is a phrase to ponder, and apply widely.

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Michael Palin voice: “[send us the money] and your lovely daughters Janice and Juliet need never know the name of your lover in Bolton.”

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"We don't morally censure you. We just want the money."

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Gates seems like he might be big into the MILF thing. Actually he seems like he would fuck absolutely anything that can't fight back.

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One fist, applied accurately to that nose, might make him a different person...might not, but worth the effort, Shirley.

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It would definitely make him dial back that smirk he perpetually sports if said fist were aimed precisely enough to his incisors. I don’t think he’d want to project an Alfred E. Neuman image.

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I just realized I misspelled his name, but eh, who fucking cares, anyway?

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Quincy Jones, in an interview some while back, claimed that Marlon Brando would "fuck a mailbox" if he were in the right mood. I'd rather think Gaetz would... um, copulate with one of those dorky "Prayer for Today" boxes outside certain houses.

But only if he had slipped it ketamine first...

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I trust Q(uincy).

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I would guess Gaetz would go for a Billy Bass Singing Fish wall plaque

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I read in the New York Times that Matt didn't want to go out on that speaking tour with Marge. They finally convinced him that it would be like going out with three 16-year-olds at once so he agreed.

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New Maths!

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Gaetz: "Gosh, your Honor, all I did was sleep with half of a 30-year old!"

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This aligns with my theory of Trump as a poor, misunderstood guy who only wanted to be a standup comic, but he was forced into real estate by his overcontrolling father. Now he pursues his dream in the only way he knows how.

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Take my wife...Please! No, not THAT wife...Hey, where you goin' with that shovel?!

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She goes on the 14th Fairway

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Plastic Stochastic Lover!

"bottle-green embroidered vest"

This is a 2-marker anyway, but how it plays at the reveal is cherce.

3 marks!

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REBID! 100% of the content with 150% of the value. It pays for itself!

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Jesus.

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Agreed.

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Yeah, he showed up, too:

Trump Shares Post Showing Him In Court With Jesus

The Daily Mail reports:

Former President Donald Trump shared a strange court sketch on social media that showed him at his Manhattan fraud case with a person who looked like Jesus Christ sitting next him. The former president and 2024 candidate, 77, scowled and shook his head as prosecutors accused him of ‘lying year after year’ to exaggerate the value of his property empire by $2.2 billion to obtain favorable bank loans.

https://www.joemygod.com/2023/10/trump-shares-post-showing-him-in-court-with-jesus/

Trump's pissed off Jesus is very Aryan, nice cheekbones and brow ridge: resembling Dürer's, except constipated.

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This isn't proper form, he's supposed to be standing behind Trump with is Holy Hand on Trump's shoulder. This way looks like he's just a co-defendant.

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Changes water into wine, fails to pay New York State liquor tax.

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2 Maker's Marks!

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"Trump's pissed off Jesus is very Aryan, nice cheekbones and brow ridge: resembling Dürer's, except constipated"

So, Jesus IOW...

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Fun to visualize Queens Man referencing Dürer.

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Durer's Jesus ate more fiber

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I once flew down to Houston for a job interview at Amoco, forgot to pack a belt. So I did the interview without a belt, didn't get the job. I wish I knew then you could buy a belt at the airport.

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David Brooks bought two belts at the airport, but of the scotch variety.

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He produces miles and miles of column pixels that nobody really reads, yet his going "Set 'em up Joe" at Newark is what gets everybody talking. . .

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It’s the first remotely interesting thing I’ve heard about him in years. You’ll note his only items of interest are when he tries to play Everyman, as with Applebees and deli meats, and completely shows his ass.

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"...as with Applebees and deli meats, and completely shows his ass."

Which coincidentally is made of deli meat....

Just one meat

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*shudder*

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flank steak? We don't really have deli's in SD

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Tongue-loosening juicening...

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He cracks he up.

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2 marks.

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I’ve often wondered who, after passing thru TSA,needs to by a suitcase? A belt I can see; lots of stuff gets left at Security Theater, but a suitcase? Were you carrying your stuff in a paper bag? Were you in too much of a hurry to pack? “Hey, there’s a Travelpro shop, just what I need!”

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Ah, you haven't seen Up in the Air? George Clooney makes Anna Kendrick buy a new suitcase, right there in the airport, because she has some vintage American Tourister thing and she MUST have the same rectangular black nylon wheeled suitcase that all the savvy travelers have.

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You can probably have it sent home

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(He ain't gonna be senator, either. Not in DeSantis-Land.)

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Forgot to add – I love that illustration. Those box puzzles were the wordle of their day, so logical to use for the issue at hand. But the detail, the faithful renditions, and the frustration/exasperation are well done.

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Trump is going to testify in NY, I read. I hope it’s today, before I return to the wild. Can you be charged with perjury in a civil trial? ‘Cause Trump can’t finish a sentence without lying. “Please state your full name.” “Donald Jesus Trump.” “Objection, your Honor!”

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A legal strategy hatched in the brain of one Donald J. Trump, Stable Genius, who knows how to do your job better than YOU do, stupid lawyer. Just you watch, it'll be GREAT!

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I saw footage of Trump under oath, in some deposition, and he was cowed and sullen, like a teenager dragged into the vice-principal's office.

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Oh, you know SOMEBODY'S car is gonna get keyed.

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About Byron Donalds, I've seen that guy in action, he's pretty smooth, got the lyin' skills down, I'd say he's one to watch. Unless Republicans only keep Black people as pets, in which case he's goin' nowhere.

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Also I'm eagerly looking forward to reading "Dibs sleeps with the fishes."

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We assumed the outcome was automatic

When they took Dibs out behind the paddock

The Queens Man was urgin'

Dibs sleep with the sturgeon

But settled at the end for a haddock

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oh my god! always leave them wanting more!!!

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