22 Comments

I really enjoyed this!

I kinda missed the scene where Sly rises up out of the water firing two heavy machine guns at once in Super Slow Motion.

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

This movie would make a kajillion dollars. I don't think the foreign market would be profitable, however.

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

This goddamned weepy Oscar bait doesn't do a thing for me.

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

Roy, Roy, Roy . . . I am soooo disappointed that you've had to stoop to copy-pasting someone's jerkoff fantasy from 4chan.

Seriously, though--I could see Steve Bannon bankrolling this movie. It's got all the elements he'd love!

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

“Each EXTENDIBLE clanks his or her own balls as a form of applause.”

Damn, that’s some ruling class seal of approval quality literary verbiage there. Unfortunately, like democracy, justice is on some huge decline.

But a quibble because I’m an unredeemable asshole: somewhere in that first scene, Tommy is supposed to ask Exposition whether this time we’ll be allowed to win.

Expand full comment

When that first Expendibles movie came out I looked at the cast, figured out the average age and thought maybe they should have called it "The Disposables"

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

(Sorry, you seem to have misspelled "The Fungibles")

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

The character names are aces. I smell a spinoff. “Chunk Beefhead & Breasts: This fall on NBC!”

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

Hilarious. You had me at the cast of characters. (Here's hoping Mickey Rourke makes it to the assault on the Capitol.)

OT, but could someone explain to me the craze for turning one's body into a mural? These days, Stallone looks like a Palm Beach alte kaker wearing a paisley shawl.

Expand full comment

"and beat up the Taliban" is the action direction of the decade. Okay, of the century. But isn't Shady Slim supposed to be revealed as a perfidious traitor, a la Joey Pants in (SPOILER ALERT) The Matrix? And can someone tell me who Madelaine Petsch is?

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

Dolph and Chuck are gonna be so pissed they missed the cast call. Maybe they’ll make it for the sequel “Extendibles: Antarctica Weather Station.”

Expand full comment
Aug 18, 2021Liked by Roy Edroso

Hilarious!!! 5 guffaws for sure.

"What is it with you people and your stupid catchphrases?"

Really, what *is* up with Americans and that shit. It's like Americans walk around thinking their in their own goddamn movie.

Expand full comment